“I am gay and I am proud.” If its OK to say that for a man, is it OK to say, “I am an IVF father and I am proud”? There are certain secrets that we take with us when we die if not for selfish reasons then to save someone else. But does that mean those “secrets” should be used as a WEAPON against you and worse, as a WEAPON against your innocent children? Or should such people be censored and silenced? What could be the possible motives behind “sushing” people, otherwise known as oppression and abuse. The common theme is whenever fighting for social justice, first the minority is abused and silenced and later given their EQUAL rights while in the meantime several INNOCENTS suffer. Eventually, the TRUTH makes it out and always finds a way. It takes courage to say the truth and stand behind the truth against all adversities. Thanks to the strong values instilled by parents, I am still alive after the heinous and horrific torture and abuse for a decade. Let us see if truth continues the same or provides a ray of hope for me and my innocent IVF children? No one is saying that a life of an intersex and infertile person is NOT traumatic but to use secrecy, lies, threats and abuse as a weapon to perpetrate crimes against unsuspecting, innocent is far worse. We are sympathetic to the intersex person both in words and action but having our children in LEGAL LIMBO is far WORSE. It is SECRECY AND LYING the real culprits. What we are seeking is a solution as a way forward, not a continuation of secrecy and lies of the past. To the medical community who actively participates in this secrecy and lying which is a CRIME, walk in our shoes for one day to understand the repurcusions of secrecy and lying making victims out of innocent intersex people, families of intersex people and lives of innocent children. While their hearts may be in the right place, their decisions are NOT.
Had the two innocent IVF siblings NOT BEEN SPLIT, this story may have never made it out. Granted, the FACTS are very unique, and one has to ask themselves, can this be a happenstance or for FACTS to be so TWISTED, was it pre-meditated to SPLIT the IVF children? I want IVF children to be in NO LEGAL LIMBO so they can ENJOY EQUAL PROTECTION UNDER THE LAW. Is it wrong for a parent to want EQUAL rights for their children?
We are dealing with a TRIPLE WHAMMY – intersex, infertility, immigration but ABOVE ALL we are dealing with secrecy, lies, fraud, abuse, and threats. We simply CANNOT abandon an innocent child, we have to fight for TRUTH. If you have a case precedence, please do let us know, we are all ears.
Historically, slaves were tried to be “sushed” but they got liberty, women suffrage was not welcome initially but they got liberty (and some may say, there is still ways to go for equal rights for women), same result with civil rights and apartheid, end to colonialism including where leaders like Mahatma Gandhi was tried for “sedition charges”, the infamous “baby scoop era” only to apologize later, the gay rights movement still under way. Then we have IVF (infertility) and intersex. To truly understand this case, one would have to “fast forward” a few decades. In the meantime, there are VICTIMS who are suffering because of SECRECY AND LIES and the resulting crimes from the lies.
People who are infertile are DESPERATE to have a child and may present fraud documents or kidnap children or even KILL people to have a child at any and all costs. People who are seeking JUSTICE continue to speak the TRUTH without HARMING anyone because they understand the POWER OF TRUTH…it may take time, but TRUTH prevails, there is NO need to harm, defame, lay false allegations, abuse, silence, threaten anyone.
Core Issue – Truth
One can see why an infertile and intersex person wants to defame, lay false allegations, commit perjury, fraud, abuse, alienation, and other crimes just so that they can have control of an innocent IVF child. If you TRULY LOVE a child, you would teach them TRUTH with COMPASSION. The issue is neither intersex NOR infertility (IVF) but LYING, FRAUD, ABUSE and complete DISREGARD for the LAWS. And then wanting to censor and silence the TRUTH for selfish gains. How will other intersex people BENEFIT by staying silent? How will other binational immigrant infertile parents who may use IVF BENEFIT by staying silent? The right answer is education and spreading awareness and getting EQUAL rights.
Years ago breast cancer or cancer in general was considered TABOO and created more confusion by the secrecy surrounding it. Today, education and awareness has NOT only changed it but also we celebrate both the cancer patient and caregiver. If a gay couple are madly in love with each other in 1960s, would they go to a different country and get a “marriage certificate” and present it in the US as a “valid marriage certificate” knowing fully well its fraudulent. Even if the couple “gets by”, does it HELP the gay rights cause? Or is it better to advocate and get EQUAL rights and wait to get married. Just ask the thousands of “same-sex” couple getting married LEGALLY in 2012, 2013 and so on…
Change For the Future
I am an IVF parent and I am proud. I want my IVF children to know the truth, not learn secrecy and lying. After a DECADE of secrecy and lying, I have learnt that more than helping anyone, it punishes innocent VICTIMS. Lets get into the SOCIAL JUSTICE by education and advocacy. It may take time like other social justice issues of the past but its the RIGHT thing to do. In the meantime, if I am to be censored or oppressed or abused, it is NOTHING new of how humanity DEALS WITH CHANGE. Has history taught us something or are we still as RIGID to CHANGE? Time will tell.