An IVF son cannot see his father because…

The FATHER, the primary care provider, and SON must be punished for DARING to attempt to give HUMAN RIGHTS to someone in SILENCE within the four walls of the house. What a terrible CRIME that is committed that the father and his IVF children MUST be PUNISHED and SEPARATED. Should we REPEAT baby scoop era on “socially unacceptable” norms which governments apologized for later? A father and son who LOVE each other deeply and miss each other terribly but MUST be SEPARATED because…infertility is a BIG CURSE? Are only INFERTILE people allowed to LOVE children? And the LOVE of the BIOLOGICAL PARENTS is NONSENSE? Infertility is natural – not a human’s fault but LYING, CRIMES to separate a father and son, a brother and sister, a child and his biological family is done by HUMANS – What is worse – the curse of nature or the curse of humans?

“This was not a crime of greed, this was not a crime of vengeance, but it was an act of selfishness, a crime of selfishness” – said Judge P. Kevin Castel of Federal District Court.

An alienating parent STATING that the other parent CANNOT raise his child till the child is eighteen years of age is ABUSE. It may not seem that way now but just like the GAY rights movement, in a decade after the alienated parents’ movement, it will be CALLED ABUSE which is a crime. If a parent takes a son, a young male AWAY from his father until he is 18, it is ABUSE. If a non-biological, infertile parent takes a child away from the biological family till the child is 18 with heinous suppression of facts and breaking the laws, it is ABUSE. Could they have done this if LAWS were respected and DUE PROCESS was allowed and WITHOUT abandoning a second IVF sibling as a major decoy? Gay marriage was ILLEGAL in 2003 but is LEGAL in 2013. Parental Alienation is LEGAL in 2013, what will it be in 2023? You have to start thinking from the CHILD’s perspective?

“If you can find something that you’re really passionate about, whether you’re a man or a woman comes a lot less into play. Passion is a gender-neutralizing force.” – said Ms. Marissa Mayer. As an IVF father, I am completely passionate about IVF, however, my gender of MALE was used against me and my IVF children to SPLIT them. We are still waiting for a gender-neutralizing force in parenting rights at home.

There are certain conventional wisdoms and then there are unconventional wisdoms. Living with a combination of intersex, infertility (IVF), immigration and invisibility (lack of laws) in 2000s is unconventional by any odds. In fact, the odds are 1 in a billion! So does that mean it’s OK to separate an IVF son from his father with LIES? Would an IVF mother be separated from her IVF child? Given the rarity of the case, we do not expect most people to understand the issues at FIRST GLANCE. A deeper understanding of the FACTS is required which calls for a small investment of your time. Certainly, the father cares and the IVF children care, because its their lives. For others, it may be just a statistic – 1 in a billion! Not to mention the laws that have been violated and the crimes committed to achieve the separation. If laws were followed, could the IVF family have been separated? Only a CRIMINAL is afraid of the TRUTH and attempts to muzzle the TRUTH. Will the LOVE for the innocent child be any LESS if TRUTH is known? For those of us who lie for others and its NOT natural, doesn’t it get tiring? Does an IVF parent have any right to see their IVF children together as they desired or should their GENDER be used against the innocent, voiceless children/siblings?

1) What a terrible crime the father has committed – he and his IVF children must be punished by separating them. Claiming to LOVE a child while separating him from his sibling, loving father, refusing FACTS and TRUTH (has legal implications), IT IS NOT LOVE for the innocent, voiceless CHILD. Placing the CHILDREN in LEGAL LIMBO is not LOVE for the CHILDREN, is it CRIMINAL? The male spouse (because of his gender) may NOT have human rights but does his IVF children have human rights? If one has committed NO CRIMES, then why do they need to FORCE SILENCE? Is that a continuation of ABUSE?

2) We are sympathetic to the intersex cause and not just in words but by actions. We have experienced the discrimination against the intersex family first-hand starting with the secrecy and lies. But does that mean our IVF son has to GIVE UP his biological family, his siblings, his father? Does that mean our IVF son has to give up his primary care provider? Is it a CRIME to be married to an intersex person and one must be PUNISHED by separating the children after LIVING through the secrecy, lies, fraud, abuse, violence, silence?

No one knows the future but what will remain constant is the TRUTH. Whether the US recognizes intersex as women or as third gender, no one knows. There are people calling for legal recognition of third gender in the US and other countries have legally recognized the third gender, no one knows where US laws will go. What we do know is that there has to be compliance with current laws and lying on legal documents and presenting them as “valid” documents in court is a crime. Regardless of which direction US laws go for intersex families, TRUTH will remain constant. A spouse caregiver of intersex, an immigrant IVF father of two lovely children appealing to UNITE them is the TRUTH even though it is construed as LIES for personal benefit. Ridiculous claims are made where person is NOT intersex or the torturous intersex surgery NEVER happened or the child is NOT IVF. Each has a legal implication. The right answer is change the laws, not to break the laws and harm and abuse innocent, unsuspecting victims. 

3) It is a FACT that the father was the PRIMARY CARE PROVIDER for the IVF infant because the intersex person was pre-disposed with their ongoing secretive medical treatment. Being intersex and being a genetic male has nothing to do with it, it is simply the ongoing medical treatment made the intersex person unavailable. And genetic males can be primary care providers of children like in a gay relationship or single fathers or a young, male, spouse caregiver of intersex AND IVF father. Secrecy and lies are NOT the answer. Empowerment with the TRUTH is the way forward.

4) If an intersex person wants to claim to be SAME as a woman, do it so legally and truthfully, not behind closed doors while breaking the laws. It has unintended consequences on innocent victims including children.

5) If a medical professional wants to claim an intersex person is SAME as a woman, do it so legally and truthfully, not behind closed doors while creating false medical records and breaking the laws. It has unintended consequences on innocent victims including children. Was the intent of the medical professional for the intersex person to use this fraud medical record in court of law as TRUTH? Will they support this fraud record? And if the medical community thinks its the right thing to do, then why have they STOPPED from creating such FRAUD medical records? What are the consequences – intended or inadvertent of FALSE medical records? What about the ABUSE on spouse and the innocent infant? When health professionals make false medical claims, it has reverberating effects on innocents including not getting justice they deserve.

6) If an intersex family wants to claim their child SAME as a woman, do it so truthfully and legally, not by DUPING and FRAUDING an unsuspecting victim into a marriage while breaking the laws. It has unintended consequences on innocent victims including children.

7) If parents of an intersex child wants to claim their child SAME as a woman, do it with pride and love, show up to help and support a spouse caregiver as their intersex child is working through the effects of an intersex surgery during a marriage. Unless you witness it, how do you know what its like? Continuing to lie for your child and teaching your child to lie has unintended consequences on innocent victims including children.

8) If an intersex family wants to claim their child SAME as a woman, do it with dignity, civility, and humility. A spouse of intersex has to deal with infertility, the parents DO NOT. How can they know the effects of infertility in a marriage? A spouse also has to deal with being the primary care provider for the IVF child due to the ongoing secret medical treatment of the intersex spouse. Lying has consequences on innocent victims including children and ironically, its the IVF children who are born due to the infertility.

9) By continuing to LIE and living in DENIAL is NOT helping anyone. Truth is the only way forward because separating SIBLINGS is heinous. Placing an “order” for an IVF child and later abandoning the IVF child with NO responsibility and accountability and placing the innocent IVF child in LEGAL LIMBO is heinous and a crime against her basic human rights. What’s next, HUMAN CLONING for personal amusement because some affluent person needs a kidney or a liver or a heart?

10) Disallowing the IVF son the TRUTH is perpetuating the same LIES that were taught to an intersex child. How did that turn out?

11) Disallowing the IVF son the TRUTH and NOT allowing him to meet his sibling or his father and the family is PERSONAL interest and NOT his best interest.

US is based on rule of laws and is a compassionate country. Do they condone this behavior? Will they take the time to invest in this case to understand the facts and see that the strategy of secrecy and lies used to “solve” social issues like “intersex” is being repeated for other social issues like “infertility – IVF”. Is that a good strategy? The consequences of lying, breaking the laws, secrecy eventually bears out. In the context of social issues, by helping ONE person through lying, secrecy, and breaking the laws, how does it help the other intersex children and other IVF children and families? The right answer is change the LAWS with our changing realities.

Do NOT PUNISH innocent children for crimes they did not commit.