Secrecy and stigma are bigger culprits than the medical condition itself. Infertility is sad and traumatic and makes people do strange things. While we are far away when it comes to equal rights for LGBTI, are we even farther away for equal rights of caregivers of LGBTIÂ who try to help in good faith? Rather than resorting to name calling or derision, it would be prudent to get to know ALL the facts first and work amicably. This case is ALL about equality and social justice – where prevailing laws fall short.
- Equal rights cannot be won by trampling human rights of others especially innocent children. Are human rights based on the trauma scale of each human?
- Maulik lived and practised the Yogyakarta principles for LGBTI activism BEFORE they were even conceived, what is the outcome when an individual tries to give human rights to someone where even the laws fall short?
- If there were equal rights for LGBTI, Maulik and his biological children would not have been separated.
- Among LGBTI, there is a difference. Lesbian and gay couple are informed consenting adults in a relationship. What about an intersex relationship built on fraud?
- Should spousal caregivers of intersex be treated equally with respect and dignity as parental caregivers of intersex? Should spousal caregivers of intersex have equal access to information and resources?
- Would the siblings be growing up together if Maulik was an 46, XX chromosome intersex person with internal female organs but physically looks like a male? Is there intimidation and bias against looks?
- How do we better a human life? With truth or secrecy and deceit? When you tuck your children or grandchildren in tonight, will you teach them to say the truth with love and compassion.
Facts About Intersex Condition:
| Fact | Intersex Patient | Spousal Caregiver of Intersex Patient |
|---|---|---|
| Occurrence | Statistically, 1 in 20000 which is 350000 out of 7 billion people in the world. | No reported cases. Statistically it is as low as 1 in billion which is about 6-7 people in the whole world. |
| Traumatic Condition | Yes | Yes |
| Secrecy | Yes | Yes |
| Stigma | Yes | Yes |
| Protection Under Law Against Domestic Violence | No | No |
| Informed Consent | Yes | No |
| Sex Reassignment Surgery | Yes | Its effects |
| Hormone Replacement Therapy | Yes | Its effects |
| Infertility and Adoption | Yes, some intersex parents opt for adoption in US but not allowed in India | Barring love, a young, fertile male would leave but has to face the same infertility issues if he stays. |
| In vitro Fertilization (IVF) | Intersex people are not allowed yet to opt for surrogacy | Yes but international laws are not equal. |
| Respect | Laws are still forming on this in general for LGBTI | Unknown and stereotype of male gender is used |
| Received Trust | Yes or a loving caregiver would not stay | ?? |
| Love | Yes or a loving caregiver would not stay. Here is a real story from India without family support. | In phases due to treatment |
| Legal Marriage | Laws are still forming on LGBTI marriage equality. | Yes |
| Support Group | Yes | No |
Do not get so busy caregiving that your trauma and suffering is oblivious to you and others.
Change takes birth from injustice to someone, somewhere
When all inspirational quotes are exhausted, real change happens
Say NO to inheritance of hypocrisy
Imposed Silence is NOT golden
Spouse discomfort can be overcome only if you truly love the spouse
