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Respect – Living the Life as A Woman

I am a male. I am not transgender, I am not intersex/DSD, I am not a woman. But having experiences like family caregiving, infertility, primary care provider for children which are “traditionally” associated with women has provided me with a fresh perspective on what it may have been like to live as a woman and undergo abuse for centuries. The worst is that my gender is punishing my innocent children which has forced me to speak up. I have learnt a lot from Susan Anthony’s, Rosa Parks’s and other women in the world and also from likes of Scotsboro boys’. While there is no comparison to what women have gone through for centuries; the injustice, neglect, abuse is what is in common – which is why there is Respect for living as a woman. Sadly, it is a cycle of being used, abused and discarded by others that we find in common. When will we have laws to protect hate crimes against IVF children and families?

1) When I was abused, I stayed silent. The law enforcement tells me that I should have spoken up then and its too late to get justice now. Does that mean the abuse did not occur? When laws were broken forcefully, I stayed silent. The law enforcement tells me that I should have reported the crimes. Does that mean the crimes did not occur? Ironically, plight of some IVF children today is what was done to innocent intersex children which is lies, fraud and manipulation.

2) If there are rape trauma crises centers, if there are sexual abuse trauma crises centers, if there are child abuse trauma crises centers, where are the IVF trauma crises centers? Having crises centers for different issues implies two things – 1) There is acceptance of facts and the need to act to protect the innocent and 2) Qualified professionals trained to act in the best interest of the victim – medical, legal, financial, etc.

In the absence of IVF trauma centers, are we as a society not wanting to accept the facts and that IVF trauma does not exist and it is better to shove the truth under the carpet like the way our society dealt with concealment based approach in treating intersex people or taking away innocent children from their biological mothers during the government approved “baby scoop era”? In the absence of IVF trauma centers, are we as a society failing to provide qualified professionals to victims including innocent IVF children and until justice is received, does it mean the victimization and abuse continues which is blessed by the system due to its inaction and lack of laws?

3) If a woman is pregnant and her spouse abandons the child and the mother-to-be, it is a sinking feeling. Is it like getting kicked in the stomach as a pregnant woman? As a left-behind parent, one moves on for the sake of the child with no child support, loss of dignity and respect for innocent child, possible character humiliations, loss of job, career, separation from family and friends, etc. Same is true for a left-behind IVF parent of an abandoned IVF child, one finds the strength and courage to move on for the sake of the child despite being a male as the society and laws deem “fathers” are “second-class” parents.

If a woman who is abandoned while pregnant, what if the spouse runs away with the older child? This leaves the woman to deal with her pregnancy all alone, provide welfare of the child on her own AND the trauma of losing a child whom she loves. Worse, the older child will not be afforded the love of a sibling he wanted because the parent has split them. In all this, the mother raises the abandoned child through the trauma and hopes someday her children will be UNITED. Is an IVF father of two split siblings allowed to have the same feeling?

If an intended parent abandons an IVF pregnancy after giving consent, who pays the surrogate and what are her rights and whose responsibility it it to raise the IVF child? Is the surrogate also considered a woman whose rights have been violated if left abandoned with an IVF child?

4) For centuries women have been the “traditional family caregiver” and for most part they still are in a majority now. A family caregiver can be in multiple roles – as a parent, child, sibling, etc. However, insenuations have existed like “being a housewife is not a real job”, “stay at home mothers” do not contribute to society, etc. Yet as loving mothers or spouses or daughters or sisters as they are, they continue to spread their love (often in silence) regardless of what laws say or what society thinks while giving up their true potential, ambitions, careers. Same is true as a spouse caregiver of intersex/DSD who is forced into silence.

And when women started asking for their rights be it rape, disenfranchisement, abuse, violence, sexual harassment, etc. initially, it was written off as “being emotional”. That was last century and it may be true even today in several parts of the world. An immigrant, IVF father feels the same way and demand for rights is discarded as “being emotional” while failing to recognize that it is the innocent IVF children who are the ones being punished because of their parent’s gender. Just like Susan Anthony’s of the world, one must continue to fight for the truth regardless of how long it takes.

5) If a woman uses her egg and gets help from a sperm donor and surrogate, she can legally take the child anywhere while if a man uses his sperm and gets help from a egg donor and surrogate, the same is not true. Who is the real victim – the IVF father or the innocent IVF child? Like any parent – mother or father, gay or straight, black or white or Asian, child with Autism or a learning challenge, etc, etc – any parent will speak up when their child is abused, violated and worse used as a “tool”. Every human being has rights, including an innocent IVF child of an IVF father.

6) There is no “I” in infertility or IVF. Dealing with infertility first requires lot of patience and compassion from fellow human beings. “I” cannot do anything. The anxiety, the sleepless nights, the pain, the suffering, the trauma, the loss of child, the failed IVF cycles, the multiple trips to the IVF clinic filled with hope, the thumbing through online forums, the blessing of a IVF child, the joy and celebration of an IVF child, etc etc affects any person dealing with IVF and infertility – it is NOT a woman or man thing, it is a HUMAN thing. Having lived through these experiences which are traditionally associated with women dealing with fertility, it has given a unique perspective on even how innocent IVF children are victimized due to being born to a “man” VS. “woman”. Our society and laws have a long way to catch up.

7) It has taken centuries and lots of abuse, violation of rights, trauma for women to begin to get equal rights in the workplace. When will men get equal rights at home in the family especially in the best interest of innocent children?

8) To the naysayers, I ask a simple question, exactly what more do you want out of a spouse – male, female, straight, gay, lesbian, intersex, otherwise?

  • You have a traumatic condition, you deal with it together and become a spouse caregiver,
  • One spouse wants silence at the cost of abuse to the other spouse, you give silence,
  • One spouse wants to lie, fraud and break the laws, you give in to the threats and abuse in silence,
  • One spouse is infertile, you deal with it together using IVF,
  • One spouse is under medical treatment and trauma preventing to be a “primary care provider” for the child, you become a primary care provider for the IVF child in silence,
  • The IVF child both love wants a sibling, both give joint consent to have a second IVF child, one spouse decides to abandon the child while the other is left to pick up the pieces including giving up his son whom he loves AND his son having to give up his primary care provider and a sister he wanted.

Perhaps the spouse is looking for slaves including innocent children with no human rights in 2014? 

Don’t give me love, don’t give me compassion, just give me respect and truth.

If being in a intersex/DSD marriage which the laws do not recognize, if becoming a spouse caregiver of DSD/intersex for a surgery which UN considers torture, if dealing with infertility with respect for the infertile spouse, if raising IVF children due to ongoing medical treatment of the spouse, if dealing with multiple lack of laws for issues like intersex, IVF, immigration in 2014 is too new is RESPECT, then all I ask is to give RESPECT to my innocent children if not me and UNITE them.

Had equal rights for intersex, equal rights for IVF children and families existed, would innocent IVF siblings have been SPLIT? Economic deprivation and loss of financial resources directly threatens the right to get justice in 2014 because no counsel works for free.

Love and Compassion Cannot Conquer Secrecy and Lies

Love and Compassion are cornerstones in being human, whether its a relationship between lovers or siblings or parent-child or friends or neighbours or states or countries. When our humanity is at stake, everything we have built around it questions our very ethos of humanity especially when the victims are innocent children. Rather than having a ethical OR moral OR legal obligation to respect a fellow human being, the true question is can love and compassion conquer secrecy and lies?

If you are an adult woman who happens to be infertile, do you get compassion and sympathy from the society if not the laws? But if you are an IVF girl child (a future woman), do you get the same compassion and sympathy from the society if not the laws?Equal IVF Child Rights Tshirt

If you are a victim of female infanticide, clerly you cannot talk. But what if you are an abandoned IVF girl child, do you have any rights as a human being and as a child?

Take the journey of how convoluted our society is in paying lip service when it comes to human rights and child rights of innocent IVF children and families. It is not about who you know, it is about how you are born is where the discrimination begins. As a society, legally, if not socially, we have conquered discrimination based on race, color, creed, gender, sexual orientation but when it comes to IVF children and families, we have some ways to go. Is IVF the new black, the new gay and the new orange?

IVF is a wonderful medical technology to help infertile or dysfertile people. As everyone knows, it takes three things to make a child scientificaly, sperm, egg and womb. But it takes love and compassion to raise a child. Not just as a parent but as a good human being. Secrecy and lies are NOT in the best interest of any child despite what the “experts” claim. Besides, where is the expert to deal with multiple complexities of intersex, IVF, immigration families?

Some IVF families are honest about their traumatic IVF journey. Some IVF families cherish the IVF children including siblings who are allowed to grow up together as a gift of the father. And some people abuse innocents through IVF and placing innocent lives at risk and in legal limbo. If the laws do not allow for biological father’s name on a birth certificate of an IVF child, shouldn’t one fight for their rights with honesty rather than placing innocent children’s lives at risk? How does the law treat non-biological, intersex parent when it comes to placing their name on an IVF child birth certificate? Adding the complexity that when the IVF child is born outside the US, that IVF child is considered as “child born out of wedlock” meaning is there a marriage or not?

There must be a silver lining to the IVF tragedy and travesty. If non-biological parents deserve equal rights, then government should have laws “in sync” with that philosophy rather than imposing that by SPLITTING innocent IVF siblings. And if non-biological parents have equal rights in raising an IVF child through love and compassion, should they also be held equally accountable and responsible in the welfare of an IVF child if either intended IVF parent abandons the IVF child? Why do we have double standards? Does the innocent child care who abused them? The innocent child cares about love, compassion and justice to get their legal rights.

Rather than pontificate on having equal rights for non-biological parents, one should have laws to reflect that also. And how do you justify actions on one side where a non-biological parent has “equal” rights to a child while on the other side abandoning another non-biological child? Do the innocent children as individuals have any rights or are they human chatal? Do the innocent biological siblings have any rights or do they deserve to be punished for crimes they did not commit? Does the innocent “biological parent” deserve to be punished based on the fact they are “fertile”, OR “immigrant” OR “male” OR any other justifiable discrimination in 2009? The question is NOT whether it is discrimination and abuse, the question is whether the “justifications” of 2009 will stand the test of time? Just like slavery, women suffrage, colonialism, apartheid, civil rights, gay rights, “orange rights”, IVF rights is coming and then these false justifications will be exposed for what they are. Stop pontificating and start caring about real human beings – the innocent children. Love and compassion will conquer the mountain of secrecy and lies because that its power, because thats what makes us human. Let the tsunami of love, compassion and truth be unleashed to wash away the mountains of secrecy, lies, crimes for the sake of innocent IVF children.

Follow Science in Best Interest of Child

Intersex is an umbrella term for certain medical conditions and some consider themselves male, some female and some want a “third gender”. A personscience-intersex-ivf has every right to feel what they do as long as it is not abusing and/or hurting anyone else.

A spouse of intersex has experienced the very same events as the intersex person and if there is trauma for intersex person, is there any trauma for spouse who experienced the same event with secrecy, lies, misinformation?

The beauty of following science is it relies on facts – something both the medical and legal worlds are based on. While experiencing the intersex surgery and the after-effects of the same and the medical mistreatment, common sense tells you it’s wrong and unnecessary. But how dare a non-medical youngster challenge a triple MD and a decades old malpractice? Finally in 2013, the UN Special Rapporteur on Torture proved the gut feeling by calling for a STOP to such intersex surgeries. Maybe innocent IVF children can have an opportunity to grow up together had this come a decade ago.

A medical record is the language of communication between doctors and should always be based on science and facts. If a doctor does intersex surgery and claims “removal of ovaries” when in fact it was “removal of testes”, it sets of an inadvertent chain reaction. First you just taught the patient and family to lie and the system will institutionally support the lies. Next when the patient goes to fertility specialist to have a child, the medical decision is based on erroneous facts. Next when the patient goes to a lactation consultant to breastfeed an infant, the subject matter expert gives medical advise based on erroneous facts. Next when the patient goes to a pediatrician to breastfeed an infant, the doctor gives medical advise again based on erroneous facts and placing an innocent child, her patient, at risk and is abused. More importantly, the infant gets no milk and is abused despite access to best subject matter experts.

There is no issue in intersex people feeling male or female or third gender. But instead of forcing that philosophy on innocent children in silence, first get the medical literature changed and also get the laws changed to allow legal marriage, immigration and fertility rights for infertile people. Why abuse innocent children for all this? Intersex is rare. Caster Semenaya was given an Olympic medal first in the women category, then rescinded, then reinstated as a woman. This affects her physically. The message affects several other intersex people globally. However is it different when  medical decisions are taken similarly that affects both the patient AND others physically including innocent children? Do others have rights too? Or do they deserve to be abused simply because they were forced into silence?

Follow the Science :
1) Not all intersex people have the surgery done. Of those intersex people who have surgery done, most have it performed either as a child or in puberty. Very trace amounts are done after 21. Almost none are done during a relationship or marriage. Is there a scientific study to understand the effects of intersex surgery during marriage?

2) Intersex people who are genetically male may be able to breastfeed. Adoptive mothers who are genetically female have been able to breastfeed. However, not all have had success with lactation due to different reasons. Biological mothers who also take hormones to breastfeed are not always successful. It’s traumatic but a scientific fact. Is it an apples and apples comparison from a scientific standpoint? Is there a scientific study on breastfeeding by intersex genetic males or are we using innocent infants as guinea pigs and abusing them? Would you give your infant for this study?

3) An intersex person who has the surgery done needs to go on hormonal therapy and take estrogens. Lactation comes from a separate hormone, prolactin. Is there a scientific study on the effects of taking both hormones simultaneously? Are they competing? More importantly, if the medical records are fraud and subject matter experts are also frauded as a result, is the innocent infant at risk? Is the child being abused and forced to breastfeed and incessantly cry when there is NO milk?

People who want to live honestly and follow the laws have a problem including honest intersex people. Like asking the court to allow male to female surgery or have it covered by insurance. Liars, criminals who break laws do not have this problem. For them secrecy, lies, cheating, fraud worked and the system helped and they didn’t get abused, others are being abused including innocent children, where is the problem?

Miss You on Missing Out

The reason an IVF brother cannot see his IVF sister or his biological family is because he is born through IVF to an immigrant, IVF father in 2000s – tooIVF-children-alienation early for our times. If he is happy growing up away from his biological family without his knowledge, could he have been HAPPIER growing up freely with his siblings, family, truth, having a valid legal identity? When love is enveloped with secrecy, lies, fraud, abuse, breaking laws, criminal acts, is it love? It is not ONLY about the infertile and affluent adult but also about donors, surrogates and IVF children. Pass laws and not separate children from biological family like the baby scoop era. We miss our child on missing out :

0) Our son cannot fulfill his dream of having a sibling – journey that took 3 years, several failed IVF attempts, and 4 more unjust years and counting…

1) Our son cannot kiss or hug his sister and a sister cannot kiss or hug her brother. It is about the love.

2) Our son cannot marvel first hand at how infants are so small and how they grow up. It is about the love.

3) Our son cannot play house, or kitchen, or bath time with his sister and enjoy the awesome play juice and play snacks she makes. Siblings will fight with each other but when a third person enters, they become a team of one – typical siblings – our son misses out. It is about the love.

4) Our son cannot celebrate in sibling events like Rakhi, Bhai Duj, Siblings Day and so on. It is about the love.

5) Our son is being brainwashed and alienated from his biological family. It is about the love.

6) Our son cannot read books, ride the bike, fly kites, and so on with his siblings. It is about the love.

It is one thing to have anti-gay laws, anti-IVF laws, anti-intersex laws, anti-immigrant laws, but to use them in order to SPLIT innocent IVF siblings takes it to whole another level – certainly not the best interest of the child. And if a person did not care about the human rights of an intersex, immigrant, infertile person, would they have international IVF children as an immigrant and spouse caregiver of intersex? It is time to move on and start thinking about the future generations of IVF children and families…An IVF parent is very resilient, persistent and determined – its in their IVF DNA.

7) Our son does not have a valid legal identity to travel and so much education, exposure to his growth and development is stunted. Is it love?

8) Our son has to be lied to about his birth and the fact it is through IVF which dishonors the very basic fundamentals of humanity and compassion of people like the donor and the surrogate. Will he learn to be compassionate? Will he learn to speak the truth? Is it love?

9) When equal rights do not exist, one should not break the laws but respect the laws and demand for a change in laws. By forcing secrecy, lies, abuse, defamation, breaking the laws and forcing anyone to speak the truth to bring change is no way to teach an innocent child. Is it love?

10)  Every human being deserves a child but it needs to be done ethically, morally, and legally because no matter how good a parent you are now, one has to face their IVF child eventually with facts and love. There is no love in secrecy, lies, and breaking the laws – it is criminal. There is no love in abandoning an IVF child during pregnancy, it is criminal. There is no love in continuing to place innocent IVF children in legal limbo for personal benefit and call it love – its selfishness which is a crime as per Judge Castel.

If I Were A Woman…

Looking for an Erin Brockowich or “Pam Landy” from the movie “The Bourne Ultimatum”. Anyone willing to give it ALL to uncover the TRUTH and provide relief to the VICTIMS?

1) If Maulik were a woman…The innocent children would be UNITED and growing up together.Children Looking for Birth Parent

First, the prevailing laws would NEVER SPLIT innocent brother and sister, if born of the same woman. But since the innocent children are born through IVF, it is morally and legally OK to SPLIT them because of their parent’s gender. The heart weeps for innocent, voiceless children who are victims based on a parent’s gender. First, a spouse of intersex was victimized using lies and fraud under silence and now the same victimization is being continued on innocent, voiceless children. Is it time to speak up? Victimizing unsuspecting humans to secure one’s own human rights is NOT a solution, its multiple violations of multiple human beings.

Every child in this world has a mother. Only a mother can give birth…humans have not figured out yet how to do that outside the womb. But is every mother ALSO a “legal mother”? IVF does open up some doors for varying definitions of a “legal mother”. If a man uses his sperm, an anonymous donor and surrogate, who is the “legal mother”? Only the father would be the KNOWN biological parent for the IVF children.

A Child’s ONLY FAULT…

a) From 1940s to 1970s, USCanada and Australia during the baby scoop era forced adoptions of innocent children born to single mothers out of wedlock because it was “socially unacceptable” and gave the children to “deserving infertile couples”. The ONLY FAULT of the innocent child to grow up SEPARATELY from the biological family is they were born to a “single mother”.

b) Today, the ONLY FAULT the innocent IVF siblings are growing up SEPARATELY is because of their only known biological parent’s GENDER, a male and that is “socially unacceptable”. Gay fathers, single fathers, IVF fathers are not looked upon as “socially acceptable” yet.

2) If Maulik were a woman…his daughter and mother would not have been punished.If I were a woman

Accidents happen. A mother dies during child birth or a mother has a severe medical condition right after child birth which prevents a mother from being the primary care provider for an infant. But what if an intended parent places an “order” for an IVF baby in India while living in the US and DOES NOT show up when the “ordered IVF baby” is born in India and meet the US Immigration law requirements. Instead the infant girl child is pre-meditatively abandoned and an innocent aging grandmother raises the innocent IVF granddaughter at a great personal cost to her health. If Maulik were a woman, he could have taken his biological child with him to the US WITHOUT anyone’s help or support.

3) If Maulik were a woman…there would be more social, legal, financial, moral support to UNITE the innocent brother and sister.

There would be several social organizations offering legal, financial, and moral support to UNITE the innocent brother and sister. But because the SAME two innocent brother and sister are born of a father, they get LESS support. If you do not know what its like to be discriminated because of your colour, caste, creed, religion, but now one can see that innocent CHILDREN are punished because of their only biological parent’s GENDER, a male.

4) If Maulik were a woman…There would be more support, empathy and help during the caregiving years.

It is a FACT that there are MORE female caregivers than male. As a result, it is only logical to find more support, help and someone to SHARE for respite as a caregiver. A caregiver does not CONTROL the medical situation of the patient, they are a caregiver out of love and compassion for the patient. The most important aspect for any caregiver is to be able to SHARE. As a young, male, spouse caregiver one can attest that the argument that men SHARE less than women is FALSE. While there may be MORE men who do not SHARE as women do, typically those men are also NOT caregivers and is reflected in the statistics. Men who are caregivers SHARE a LOT, its in their nature, its in the nature of any caregiver irrespective of gender.

5) If Maulik were a woman in a lesbian relationship with another woman…he would have been allowed to share the “secret” seeing how the secrecy and lies was breaking me down.

If Maulik were in a lesbian relationship with another woman, he would have received more empathy, support, and help. Maulik would have been protected from domestic abuse and violence and implicitly his child.

6) If Maulik were a woman in a lesbian relationship with another woman…he may not have been LIED to or cheated.

If Maulik were in a lesbian relationship, the spouse would have been honest from the get go. Love is built on trust and a foundation of lies (regardless of the “traumatic medical condition”) is NOT love.

7) If Maulik were a woman…he could have fulfilled my child’s wish to give him a sibling.

While wonderful medical technology like IVF affords us to have children, the LAWS have simply not caught up and are still based on GENDER of the parent. Then why allow men to have kids without a “legal mother”  and punish the innocent children?

8) If Maulik were a woman…he could have breastfed my child instead of abusing him by attempting to breastfeed with “NO MILK” as a genetic male.

While women who do not give birth to a child, through medically administered hormonal therapy they can still lactate and produce milk for a baby. Provided there is enough milk, a woman can breastfeed a child. As a male, there is no milk and while pretending to be a woman, inadvertently, an innocent infant cries incessantly for food as there is no breast milk. The right answer is to give the hungry infant formula milk like most IVF children and NOT abuse a hungry infant while trying to become a woman.

9) If Maulik were a woman…he would feel sorry for a man wanting to make IVF children without a “legal mother”.

There are men who are gay, there are men who are married to Eunuch or intersex, there are single fathers, there are fertile men in a heterosexual relationship with an infertile woman, who WANT children. In a case of IVF, the only known biological parent in any of these cases is the MALE. As a fertile lesbian or single woman, the same gender-based IVF laws do not affect a woman. Feel sorry for such fertile men who love and want children but LAWS punish both them and inadvertently their CHILDREN.

10) If Maulik were a woman…as a mother, he would ask to STOP this crime on humanity and innocent IVF children by placing them in LEGAL LIMBO.

A birth certificate is NOT the property of parents, it is the property of EACH INDIVIDUAL. Therefore its authenticity is CRITICAL for a LIFETIME. Recently, there was a big row in India about a birth date for Gen. V. K. Singh (retd). Having CREDIBLE birth information for EACH INDIVIDUAL is their right which cannot and should not be denied. If we as a society cannot pass fair and equal laws, we should call a moratorium on IVF children born of fathers as the only known biological parent. Deliberately placing innocent IVF children in LEGAL LIMBO is a crime against humanity. The same bioethical reasons why human cloning is banned is the same bioethical reasons why bringing IVF children into this world with their rights in LEGAL LIMBO is wrong.

I Wish I Were A Woman…

I Wish I were a woman for the sake of my IVF children. I am perfectly happy with my masculinity and for the True Loveman I am. However, the BIGGEST blow came when MY GENDER was used as a WEAPON to SPLIT my innocent IVF children despite being the primary care provider. I wish I were a WOMAN for their sake so the innocent children could grow up together. Being raised to respect all, being raised for everyone to have EQUAL rights, if not by law then at least by your actions, being raised to respect diversity, I have learnt that LAWS are unequal and JUSTICE is not based on TRUTH and FACTS and PREVAILING LAWS. While my idealism has been broken through a VERY HARD LESSON, why are children being punished for my stupidity? I feel close to a group of people but in a very different way. The “single mothers” of the baby scoop era whose innocent biological children were taken away because their only fault was being born to a single mother in a primitive time when that was “socially unacceptable”. I cannot compare to what they felt as mothers but as an IVF father in 2013, I can empathize with “social norms” being used to SPLIT biological families rather than facts assessing love for the child.

Lawyers, legal experts, surrogacy experts, immigration experts will become Monday morning quarterbacks and tell me well you should have checked the laws before. You should have got a legal contract requiring the spouse to come to India after an IVF child birth to satisfy US immigration requirements so that both siblings can grow up together. These are all great legal thoughts but they FAIL to recognize that having children through IVF is a issue of the heart. Unless you love children, one does not go for IVF and that too internationally. Is it wrong to think from the HEART? I know the answer to that, YES it is.

Message to the Powers to Be

COURTS, JUSTICE, LAW demands to follow the laws. Answer a question : IVF children have been born with NO LEGAL MOTHER, now what? should we give LEGAL RIGHTS to such IVF children? What is the NATURAL JUSTICE?

And yes, please FOLLOW THE PREVAILING LAWS for which due process has to be allowed, a case has to be heard in the court of law with ALL the FACTS free of intimidation and threats. If you feel a mockery was made of the legal system and the justice system, please bring to justice the perpetrators. Without DUE PROCESS, how can there be justice for innocent IVF children? Without knowing ALL the FACTS, how can there be justice?

After knowing all the FACTS, if you must, that SPLITTING the innocent siblings is JUSTICE then thats fine BUT at least give them ONE OPPORTUNITY to seek justice. They are far too young and innocent to demand their own child rights and human rights. Is this what happens to IVF children born with NO LEGAL MOTHER? No rights of their own?

If gay marriage is legalized, if gay divorce occurs, will children of the gay couple be SPLIT?