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The Father’s Day I Was Forced to Miss

Every IVF journey is unique in its own way. Regardless of the fertility issues, the wanting to have a child is common to being a human not whether youfathers-day-ivf are fertile or infertile or married or unmarried or male or female. That’s why our society allows heterosexuals, singles, married, gays, lesbians and whatever other segmentation to be loving parents. Good parenting is based on being a good human being and not your gender or your sexual orientation or you immigration status. For any IVF parent – whether they are successful or not with an IVF child, wanting to have a child is innate and tugs at every emotion that a human is known to have. Then why can’t an IVF father celebrate Father’s Day on becoming a happy father? The Father’s Day I NEVER had.

It was ten years ago, my first child was born through IVF, a lovely son. He was born a few days ahead of Father’s day that year BUT I could not celebrate and jump with joy for my child because the SECRET might be out that my spouse is infertile. I was forced to miss my First Father’s Day. Today, the lies have caught up because my innocent IVF children are paying the price for it and it is time to speak up for their sake. Due to my spouse’s infertility and respecting that, I am the biological father and with help of compassionate egg donor and surrogate, we were blessed with a lovely IVF son. But the IVF was a secret and we could not tell anyone because the infertile spouse did not want to reveal to anyone about the infertility. To the select few, we could talk about surrogacy but under NO circumstances we could reveal that there was NO BIOLOGICAL LINK between the infertile spouse and the IVF child because god forbid, what if people find out the truth? Of course, due to the LIES, not only the innocent child got placed in LEGAL LIMBO but ended up disrespecting the compassion of the egg donor and surrogate for not giving them due credit. As the saying goes, when you live with a criminal who breaks laws, you pick up bad habits. Having a child through IVF is not a bad habit, LYING and continuing to LIE is the bad habit. Infertility is NOT bad, it is natural. How one deals with infertility is what is bad like secrecy and lies for personal advantage.

  • Can an IVF father be allowed to celebrate his child’s birth?
  • Can an IVF father be allowed to share his emotions from a traumatic IVF journey?
  • Can an IVF father be allowed to enjoy the company of all his IVF children as he wanted?
  • Should the innocent children of an IVF father be discriminated because of the gender of their father?
  • Is infertility so traumatic that the ONLY way to solve it is by SPLITTING innocent IVF siblings?
  • Is infertility so traumatic that the ONLY way to solve it is by alienating an IVF father from his lovely son and vice versa?
  • As a fertile IVF father, I have STARED infertility in its face. I know infertility. I have tried to defeat infertility. I know the trauma. I know the emotions. I know the lack of laws. I know that it is the LOVE and CHARACTER of a parent that counts and NOT the gender or genetic link of a parent with a child like the laws demand.
  • IVF is meant to help with infertility. Regardless of the trauma of infertility, what is happening to innocent IVF children who are siblings is far MORE traumatic. I am their IVF father and I intend to protect my IVF children and get them their rights. This fight is NO different than slavery, women suffrage, Brown Vs. Board of education, civil rights, gay rights, transgender rights, and now IVF rights. Personally I believe that over the history, every social struggle has needed a catalyst like Rosa Parks. Who is the Rosa Parks for IVF? Who is the Harvey Milk for IVF? Who is the Laverne Cox for IVF?

A shout out to all fathers – IVF, white, black, brown, blue, maroon, single, married, divorced, straight, gay, intersex, otherwise – Have a Happy Father’s Day and may you NEVER be forced to MISS a father’s day.

As another year goes by and with tears in my eyes as I get cake and card for my alienated son on father’s day and his birthday (they happen to be very close, if you recall), I wonder why should a brother be SPLIT from his sister, why should a son be separated from his IVF parent and what did all the lies achieve? Divorces are not new, they happen. But should the “best interest of the child” be maintained in any divorce? Should innocent IVF children be placed in legal limbo due to divorce? Should innocent IVF siblings be SPLIT? Should innocent IVF children be abandoned with no recourse for justice? If you consent to IVF, you are responsible for welfare of the IVF child – simple. Not the donor, not the surrogate, not the IVF clinic, not the orphanage where the innocent IVF child may end up, but the consenting IVF parent has to be held accountable and responsible. Its a new century and the crimes are new, have the laws caught up yet for IVF children and families?

 

National Fatherless Day – Absentee Parent or an Abused IVF Family?

I love my son very much. I cannot participate in my son’s life because raising his sister he wanted is equally important. Both my son and daughter are ivf-smileborn through IVF and as an IVF parent, I am married to IVF for life because the anti-IVF laws are hurting innocent IVF children and families like mine and so many more. IVF is dealt with secrecy and lies and so not many people speak up when there are issues with it, that does not mean it did not occur. When one parent is living in exile to raise an IVF child while being forced to be separated from his other IVF child, is he an absentee parent or an abused parent? Is the child fatherless or been alienated? More importantly, the two innocent IVF siblings have never met, is that abuse against the children? The innocent children are in legal limbo, is that abuse against the innocent IVF family? This is the Abu Ghraib of IVF, it has occurred due to anti-IVF laws. Speaking the truth is not being unpatriotic nor inhumane. Asking for basic human rights and child rights for IVF children and families is the right way forward. Showing basic human decency to the most vulnerable is the right answer, abandoning them or alienating them from their biological family is not. IVF is the new black, the new gay, the new orange. When will it be time for IVF rights? My lovely children are not fatherless, he has been made fatherless due to lack of laws and secrecy and lies. I have faith that the US will correct the course and fix its IVF laws, in the meantime, what about people who manipulate the IVF laws for personal advantage that places innocent IVF children at risk and in legal limbo? It makes them FATHERLESS knowingly. 

Its not what you say, but its action that counts. Had I not gone for IVF, there would have been no IVF children. Had there been equal laws for IVF children and families than a person could not have taken advantage of it by lying, suppression of facts to SPLIT innocent siblings. There would have been NO case of fait accompli in a heinous act of the perfect child abduction AND the perfect child abandonment. An individual can choose to become a Rosa Parks or Edie Windsor or Ariel Castro or Ann Pettway, that is ACTION, not words. If you are infertile, join us, because if equal laws existed then innocent IVF siblings would not have been SPLIT.

In the ancient Indian culture, there are several references to women having a child “magically”. But none ever abandoned a child to have another child. But none was successful in splitting siblings. Maiyya Yashoda raised two lovely brothers together and despite not being a biological mother is revered even today with heaps of praises for doing the “right thing”. While Kaikeyi, a biological mother, tried to SPLIT his son from his brother and take over the kingdom in her son’s “best interest”. The son neither took the kingdom he was given nor did he get along with his biological mother. So it is NOT about the “genetic link” as US laws demand to define good parenting, it is about LOVE and CHARACTER and time always supports TRUTH.

Dearly Beloved….

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to celebrate IVF. We are gathered here to celebrate the goodness in humanity like the compassionate donors and surrogates and the “village” which helps create IVF children and care for them when IVF parents are not around. Had it not been for the compassion of egg donors and surrogates, I would never have had two lovely IVF children. Regardless of how they are born, they are my children and I love them.

Is there  a difference between a sperm donor Vs. father? Is there a difference between an egg donor and mother? Is there a difference between gestational carrier and mother? Is there a difference between no sperm, no egg, no womb and being a parent because of your love towards the child?

The beauty of the US is we can openly discuss and petition our government for change without the fear or threats of being persecuted. Change may take time like abolishment of slavery, women suffrage, civil rights, gay rights, transgender rights, maybe someday IVF rights.

If a woman who uses her own eggs but due to medical reasons, uses a surrogate, is she a mother? As per US laws, yes. If a man uses his sperm but due to medical reasons, his wife can neither provide eggs or womb, is he a father? As per US laws, NO. As per US laws, the innocent child is deemed “born out of wedlock” and thereby stealing all the rights of the innocent IVF child afforded to “children of marriage”. If a woman becomes a “gestational carrier” but uses donor eggs due to medical reasons, is she a mother? Until January 2014, as per US laws, NO. Is this the US we dream of?

As an IVF father forced into exile to raise a daughter rather than abandon her and in the process losing effective custody of his IVF son is nothing short of Abu Ghraib, perhaps worse since innocent children are involved. It is torture. It is not short of an intersex person having to go through a senseless intersex surgery which the UN Special Rapporteur on Torture has called for a STOP since it is torture. Was it wrong to help a fellow infertile human being? If the US courts give a decree which is globally enforceable, shouldn’t they consider the global facts of the case at least in the best interest of innocent children?

If the US courts are so concerned about best interest of the child and justice, then if they can consider a person a parent with no genetic link, why don’t US Courts petition the US Government to change the laws to reflect their social activism instead of splitting innocent siblings? Or if a person is a parent  by virtue of giving consent to an IVF child then given the same logic shouldn’t the person be held accountable and responsible when they abandon an IVF child AFTER consenting to it? Do the benefits of IVF go to the infertile parent but the abandonment and its consequences is the responsibility of the left-behind fertile parent? Let us be very clear, the fertile parent wanted to HELP a fellow human being who happens to be infertile and having his innocent IVF children being used as “property” or rendering them in legal limbo IS NOT part of any deal. Children must have rights including IVF children, including innocent children in Thailand who have been victims of US citizens who have been prosecuted an convicted or same for Afghan child victims or Iraq child victims. Then why is there NO JUSTICE for IVF child victims in India from US citizens who have abandoned the innocent child for selfish motives with no responsibility or accountability? Do innocent IVF children in India who have been abandoned have any rights?

I got it wrong – Plain and Simple with IVF

Are we ready to UNITE and not DIVIDE innocent IVF siblings and stop punishing them for crimes they did not commit?  There is a common theme between the story of an intersex spouse and an immigrant IVF father  in 2000s and a recent published memoir, Hard Choices, by former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton had this to say about her voting for the Iraq warhillary-clinton-iraq-war-ivf in 2002.

1) “I got it wrong. Plain and simple.”

Being a spouse in an intersex marriage is not wrong but it may be illegal, having a child through IVF is not wrong, being an immigrant is not wrong, being a primary care provider for your child as a father is not wrong, helping a fellow human being who happens to lie and break laws is wrong. I got it wrong as an intersex spouse, IVF father, immigrant. Plain and Simple.

2) “As the war dragged on, with every letter I sent to a family in New York who had lost a son or daughter, a father or mother, my mistake (became) more painful,” Clinton adds.

As the fraud marriage dragged on and more truth got revealed, I realized I had been lied to and that is not love under any circumstances. I had followed my heart like my family taught me and that is not wrong. With every day passing in abuse for me and my innocent child, my mistake became more painful not due to intersex, IVF, or being an immigrant but due to lies, secrecy and breaking the laws.

3) “I thought I had acted in good faith and made the best decision I could with the information I had. And I wasn’t alone in getting it wrong. But I still got it wrong. Plain and simple.”

I thought I had acted in good faith in helping a fellow human being who happens to be intersex, infertile and an immigrant. I did not realize the severe lack of laws for our situation. I did not realize that showing compassion and respect where the laws itself falls short was such a heinous crime that my innocent IVF children had to be punished for it. I did the best I could in being a spouse caregiver of intersex, a loving IVF father, a primary care provider for my child in silence and secrecy despite the lack of laws. But I still got it wrong because I trusted a person who lies and breaks laws like a common criminal. Plain and simple.

I never dreamt that my innocent IVF children would be used as human chatal and “property” in the war on fertility. I never dreamt that innocent, voiceless children would be made victims rather than being given equal rights as a human being. I never dreamt that being born IVF would be used as discrimination rather than as celebration.

Lying for the sake of your children should not become the weapon of choice for seasoned liars. What is better? To lie to save a life or to lie to take a life?

Abandon Ship by Captain, Abandon IVF child by Intended Parent

For centuries there has been an unwritten rule that captains of a ship get rescued last when a ship is in distress. Capt. E. J. Smith of Titanic dutifully didabandon-ship-ivf this. But are there any laws to enforce this? What if a captain of a ship is selfish and decides to abandon ship in a time of distress before all the passengers have been safely rescued? Can you enforce that by laws? Is abandoning ship by a captain before rescuing the passengers “akin to murder” as South Korean president claimed? What about abandoning an IVF child in a foreign country that an adult consented to?

Much like what a captain is to a ship, a woman is to a family. Even IVF laws are written with this in mind leaving little for male IVF parents. She is the soul of the family, the bond that ties, the glue that holds it together, the soul that forgives relentlessly and the soul that takes on more unsaid hardships for the sake of the family. We all know who it is, we all have one in the family, we call her “mother”. Lately in a surprising way, captains of ships in distress have known to abandon ship rather than rescue its passengers. The unwritten rule has been broken, now what? What if the mother decides to abandon an IVF child, what do we do? There is an unwritten rule that IVF parents are engaged in IVF/surrogacy because they want a child and they would NEVER abandon an IVF child, but what IF someone does exactly that – abandon an IVF child, now what? The unwritten rule has been broken, what about the survivors who made it?

When the unthinkable happens, one has to move forward. Like when an IVF father has to live in exile because his IVF child is not welcome to the US. Like when the captain abandons ship then the vice-captain or someone lower in the chain of command takes over and do what they do best and possibly giving up their life while trying to save others. For an IVF child who has been abandoned, the first thing is who pays the surrogate who agreed to do this for a fee or does she not deserve any payment since the intended parent abandoned? Who raises the IVF child and what are their rights? Or does the child go to an orphanage and be lied to all their life and never revealed they were born through IVF only to be abandoned? Do we just shove the issues under the carpet? As in gambling, it comes down to skin in the process. Maybe if you have your womb, or your egg or sperm then maybe you are more obligated to NOT abandon the innocent IVF child. There may even be laws to track you down since you would be the “biological parent”. But if you have no ties to the child, then you can abandon the innocent child with no legal consequences. Does that seem right from the perspective of the abandoned IVF child who is in legal limbo? We as human beings are better than that or are we? Or are we all like the captain of the Italian Ship and the captain of the South Korean ship where we abandon ship and no legal consequences will occur. There are “non-biological” IVF parents who have made big sacrifices showing that it’s not the biology that counts but it’s the intent of an intended IVF parent much like a captain abandoning ship.

A parent-child relationship is based on the connect of the hearts based on truth and not what the laws say. US laws require a genetic link between a US parent and a child born outside the US, is that how we define parentage? Just like the innocent deaths of so many passengers who could have been rescued, the innocence of childhood has been killed from IVF siblings forever. For a captain of the family, the same person can be a spouse, a lover, a parent to their child AND a abuser or abandoner of their child. Which name do you refer with? A captain on a ship is still a captain but if he abandons ship, what name do you refer with? – The South Koreans refer to the abandoning captain by “Evil of Sewol”. The South Korean president likened the abandoning captain to “murder”.

I miss my son terribly, I miss my son missing out on growing up with his sibling terribly. I do have the last words he told me and the pictures of us together and they mean “I love you, Papa”. Let us see if that’s where we pick up from when we are together again or has he been brainwashed and alienated? What he thinks about me is largely up to the person raising him whether to choose to say the truth or lie in their best interest – certainly not the “child’s best interest” which is considered the gold standard by courts which I fail to grasp in an international, immigrant, IVF, intersex family case – whose best interest is kept?

Attempted Death of an IVF Parent and his IVF Children

Imagine being at the top of a waterfall, the scenic beauty, the flowing water and the radiant top of the world feel. Imagine being on theivf-saving-children banks holding your 5 year old kid’s hand and talking to him about his little sister. Just then a tsunami strikes and you are in the water with one hand holding your son’s hand who is on the river bank and in your other hand you have his new born sister who is facing downstream towards the waterfall. What would you do? If you let go off the infant, it’s guaranteed death either by drowning or the fall when she hits the waterfall. On the other side, if you try to save the infant you have to let go of the hand you are holding your son with. The water is rushing, it’s a tsunami, you have to think fast, not much time, what will you do? Save the infant or save the 5 year old – you are a parent to both children and love them equally?  Or take the plunge down the waterfall with the infant and give her a fighting chance to survive or die trying to save her. You could just let go off the infant and save your 5 year old and have another child.  What would you do? Oh yeah, the infant happens to be the sibling that your son wants.  So if you let her go, what will you answer your son? As a fellow American, the question to ask the soul of America is does the US condone behavior where US persons give consent to have an IVF child abroad through a donor and surrogate and later abandon the IVF child with no responsibility or accountability towards the innocent IVF child or the surrogate? If they had done the same in the US, would the US legal system have prosecuted them and at the very least made them accountable for the welfare of the child? Are the needs of an IVF child just the same as other children to grow, develop and prosper? Then why is there discrimination? What’s next – illegal human cloning to get a heart or other organ a person wants regardless of what happens to the clone once the heart is salvaged? Do other people including innocent children have rights? The worst is that innocent, voiceless children are the victims and being discriminated. No parent, IVF or otherwise, mother or father, wants that for their child. Time will tell whether saving an infant from drowning at a waterfall or allowing them to die is a better choice? It is a choice that no parent should ever have to make – IVF or otherwise, mother or father, fertile or infertile, immigrant or citizen, human or not. As a parent, is it better to die OR to survive and be able tell the truth so that no more innocent, voiceless victims suffer? Maybe the plan was for the IVF parent to die either from trauma or by suicide so no legal challengers exist. But he survived, his daughter survived, the sister survived, the brother survived and now its time to UNITE the innocent IVF brother and sister and NEVER have innocent IVF children be used as leverage or “tools” in the war on fertility. Most people when they approach a river, they admire it’s beauty. If its a fast downhill river with white water rapids, they admire that or if it’s a slow river, they admire the calm and serenity. Either way they admire it from the outside, perhaps take a few pictures for memories and go on. Most people do not step into the river to see the depth or is the bottom rocky or muddy or does it have vegetation, shrubs, plants, snakes, reptiles, etc. underneath the water. Even if they get knee deep, it’s not deep enough. For that, one needs to put their face inside the water to see what’s really going on. And that’s how one has to deal with the world of being an intersex, immigrant, IVF family. If you do the deeds, you will know the needs. The bigger question for humanity is do innocent children have their own human rights OR are they property of adults? Does an innocent brother have a right to grow up with his sister and vice versa? Do innocent children who have been used as chattel, leverage, tools, abandoned for personal ulterior motives have rights as a human being and do they deserve basic human dignity and respect?

Law of the Land for IVF Children and Families

If you do the deeds (love, compassion, humanity, IVF), you will know the needs (equal laws for IVF).

In a recent story, a sperm donor was ordered by a US court to pay child support for a child he had donated his sperm for out of compassion for a lesbiantruth-shake couple. He had no intent to raise the child. Another IVF father in a US court is DENIED effective custody of his IVF son even though he is the biological parent in an intersex marriage where both spouses are genetic males. What gives? And what is the “best interest of the child”? And what message do we send to the children? Should they grow up to be compassionate? Do we lead by example or by laws?

What is evident is that gays, lesbians and intersex people cannot have children by themselves. They will need “compassion” of others because science demands it. As the sperm donor put it  when asked given what he knows today, will he think of donating sperm again, he said , “Probably not”. If this is the way “compassionate” people get treated, how will future lesbians, gays, intersex people have children? What will be the rights of the child? Should we punish innocent IVF children because their infertile parents rushed and broke the laws?

What is also evident is there are no proper laws to reflect the realities of a society and laws for the diversity. How do we address the rights of the IVF children and families? A donor is a compassionate human being who wants to help others have children while taking no responsibility for the child. An IVF parent is a human being who is trying to create a family and wants to take responsibility and accountability for the children. What if an IVF father was the primary care provider for his IVF son in his tender years because of a spouse under severe medical treatment. Now the question is; are only “females” considered to be IVF parents? Is there “I” in infertility when dealing with it during marriage or both spouses get affected due to infertility? Or should the fertile spouse leave an infertile marriage because the laws have not caught up with the “compassionate” nature of humans? You see problem solved, no compassion, no child, no stealing children, no child support. However, the infertile person would remain childless. Isn’t it better to say the truth and be inclusive and have laws instead of secrecy, lies, fraud and breaking the laws?

What if a person gives consent to IVF and treats it like a “drive-thru” with no accountability or responsibility towards the IVF child? What if an adult consents to IVF in a foreign country, a lovely IVF child is conceived, and then changes their mind and abandons the IVF pregnancy never going to pick up the IVF child in a foreign country when born. An adult can do what they want but where is the responsibility and accountability towards the innocent, voiceless IVF child? Did they ask to be born? If its a crime to abandon a natural born child, why is it not a crime to abandon an IVF child? Or do we allow people to place an “order” for an IVF child at a foreign “IVF drive-thru” and abandon the IVF child with NO responsibility or accountability? A child is a child is a child. Every child deserves basic human dignity and respect just like every human has a right to have a child.

The lack of laws for IVF children and families is like placing a staircase in front of a wheelchair bound person. Is it a crime to want to make a family? Is it a crime to be compassionate? What is the bigger message especially to these unwanted IVF children – should humans be compassionate and respect the laws? Or should people be allowed to violate the laws for the sake of having a child due to their infertility even if it means violating rights of a child?

One Thing I Cannot give my IVF children

Legally, I cannot give a sister to my son and a big brother to my daughter because I am an IVF parent and an IVF family must be punished and discriminated. Innocent, voiceless children must be ivf-child-2014-equal-rights-lawspunished because for crimes they did not commit and for being born through IVF. January 12 is World Daughter Day and today let us celebrate all daughters – future sisters, wives, mothers, aunts and maybe someday there will be IVF children day when world is more accommodating. In 2014, having children through compassion from anonymous egg donor and surrogate is such a terrible crime that the innocent IVF brother and sister must be punished for crimes they did not commit. I kept my IVF son’s dream to have a sibling. A father’s dream should become his innocent children’s nightmare because he dared to be compassionate and wanted to have children. I have a dream…that someday siblings will be able to grow up together happily despite their primary care provider being a father. I have a dream…that the love and character of a parent counts more than gender of a parent.

I gave a piece of myself, I gave multiple sleepless nights, I fought with infertility in a marriage, I gave multiple international lonely trips to have a child through IVF, I sought help and compassion of other women including egg donors and surrogates, I stayed persistent and kept trying despite multiple failed IVF attempts, I am responsible for my children, I physically had two IVF children but one thing I cannot give my IVF children is a physical hug, kiss, embrace, love, companionship of a brother and sister. One thing I cannot give my IVF children is a valid legal identity. One thing I cannot give my IVF children is freedom because I am an IVF parent. I miss him on missing out because of my gender.

I have hit the pavement, endeared abuses in your name, endeared abuses in my name because I dared to have children through IVF, I have seen doors slammed in my face because I ask for your IVF child rights, I have seen offensive and abusive legal language in prevailing laws against IVF children and families, I have felt that doing IVF is a crime, I have felt that having IVF children is a crime, I have felt that my IVF children should be punished like criminals. No one’s innocent children are criminals just based on their birth type – it is discrimination. Just like discrimination that occurred during slavery, women suffrage, civil rights, colonialism, apartheid, gay rights and so on. If the laws have not caught up with technology, it is a legislative issue, that does not mean innocent IVF children are criminals. NO “parent” including a traditional parent or a statesperson of a country or an entrepreneur or a politician for the lack of laws likes to hear their “baby” called ugly. Why is it OK to treat an IVF child without basic human dignity or respect?

While most US family courts are based on love and character of a parent, the US Immigration laws are based on biology and gender of a parent – a stark contradiction. While most US family courts consider the woman who gave birth to the child as the mother, the US immigration laws require a genetic link which means a surrogate in an IVF child is immaterial as per US laws – a stark contradiction. While most US family courts consider a child born during a marriage as a “child of the marriage”, the US immigration laws consider an IVF child as “child born out of wedlock” – a stark contradiction. While US family courts would see that a person is a caring primary care provider for his child regardless of the parent’s gender being male, the US immigration law requires an immigrant father to have a “US mother” to bring an IVF child to the US – a stark contradiction.

Since US Immigration laws require a “genetic link” between a US parent and child born outside the US, here are some thoughts.

1) Should infertile parents take their 9-month term pregnant surrogate to the nearest US consulate or Embassy to give birth to their US citizen child to bypass the immigration laws?

2) Should infertile parents be treated like military families who give birth to their child born outside the US but due to circumstances are deployed outside of the US?

3) Should innocent children of Americans who dare to innovate and think outside the box be punished because of their parents actions?

4) Do infertile middle-class Americans who are infertile deserve to be childless as per laws requiring a “genetic link”?

Reproduction is a human right and regardless of laws, people are going to continue and try to procreate with the tools available. How do we protect the innocent children? Do fruits of fertility treatments like IVF children deserve equal respect and protection under the laws? Is it time for laws to catch up with technology?

While every child is special, an IVF child is coming together of more than just two parents. It embodies the best of humanity. Dehumanizing and disrespecting an IVF child is also disrespecting the best of humanity starting with the innocent IVF child.

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