Tag Archives: Rosa Parks

Happy Rosa Parks Day – What will the US do?

Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country?” – US President John F. Kennedy. For an intersex, immigrant, IVF father freedom ring free ivfthe question is not what he can do (he already did what he could which is to GIVE life), the question is who will protect his and his innocent IVF children’s rights? 

Happy Rosa Parks Day! On December 1, 1955, Ms. Rosa Parks was arrested, convicted and jailed for literally “refusing to stand up” while at a much higher level she was taking the “ultimate stand” in standing up for one’s rights. Her strength and courage inspired many then and continues to inspire many today. She proved that the prevailing laws were wrong even if they were the “laws” meaning laws may not always be right and sometimes we just have to “literally sit down” to make a BIGGER point in standing up against a failing system (in some areas). Ms. Parks and the movement showed that peaceful protest against a failing system is NOT wrong but the right thing to do for future generations to come. It also proved that USA is a great country which listens to reasoning and ALSO stands up against human rights violations including its own archaic laws. It takes a lot of character as a country to admit and move forward with that. Let TRUTH set you free. Let FREEDOM ring free is all we ask for IVF children and families. Wonder what would Ms. Parks say today about the IVF discrimination?

Do the actions (or inactions) against an IVF father and his split IVF children “born out of wedlock” match American values?

While human rights are ignored or given lip service at best in most parts of the world, the HOPE is that USA cares about human rights and can provide an equitable solution. Truth is what gives me the strength and courage to speak up and petition the most powerful nation in the world to have equal rights for IVF children and families. US President Obama  in his Thanksgiving 2014 address said, “…commitment to American ideals like justice and equality”. Is willfully splitting IVF siblings equality and justice?

After repeated lies and breaking the laws, what will the US do to send a strong message to anyone who is doing IVF abroad in the best interest of the innocent, voiceless IVF child? Will it stand up to defend the most vulnerable and uphold the laws OR let it go? What if there are other voiceless victims? The weapon doesn’t always have to be a “gun”, it can also be false records with equally devastating effect on innocent children and victims. As the Lanza case shows that “wishful thinking” even with the best of intentions is not the right answer and splitting innocent IVF siblings is a classic case of “missed opportunities” – let us not repeat our mistakes like the “baby scoop era” or civil rights, or gay rights, or women suffrage only to setup a “truth and reconciliation” commission decades later, let us give the innocent IVF siblings what they deserve – a childhood together and justice for IVF rights.

I was forced into silence and kept against my own will for 10 years in my own home in Texas. Finally, I was let go but my child was taken away from me. I was left behind with another child to care for in a foreign land. These are the facts of not some woman who has been harassed for dowry or some woman who has been raped or some woman who has been a victim of domestic violence or abuse. These are the facts of an intersex, immigrant, IVF father in Texas in 2000s. When will me and my voiceless IVF children get justice and be united to be together? The simple fact is what justice do innocent IVF siblings deserve when the justice system has been manipulated and their rights denied? Does an IVF child born during a divorce have the same rights as a natural born child?

This is not just a case of uniting IVF siblings but is about what message to send? Infertile Americans cannot bring a child born outside the US legally, so should they create fraud documents, break laws, place innocent child in legal limbo, and violate rights of so many others? Or should one be truthful and respect laws? Is abandoning an innocent child in a foreign land, using IVF as your personal baby making factory with utter disregard for innocent children and surrogate and hide in the US escaping justice from the foreign courts the modus operandi the US encourages its citizenry through it lack of action and denial of truth? Splitting innocent siblings will never be justifiable, taking away a child from their primary care provider will never be justifiable. Countries like US, UK, Canada, Australia engaged in the baby scoop era in separating innocent children from their biological families through lying, suppressing truth only to apologize decades later. Is that what’s going on now with IVF children and the secrecy and lies surrounding them?

As a lifelong believer both in practice and words of equal rights for intersex and IVF, one cannot simply stand on the sidelines while more humans are being traumatized and denied rights including innocent children. The question to ask is can an intersex, immigrant, infertile person repeat this in 2014 legally? The answer is no meaning laws must have been broken and the fight to have equal intersex and IVF rights must go on to save innocent lives and the most vulnerable – voiceless children.

In 1922, Mahatma Gandhi was charged with sedition charges only to be vindicated 25 years later. In. 1955, Rosa Parks stood up for what she believed is wrong even though reserving seats in a bus based on “skin color” was legal at the time. In 1962, Madiba was tried under apartheid laws only to be vindicated 27 years later. How is an intersex, immigrant, IVF father treated in 2000s? More importantly, how are his IVF children being treated? The greatest humanitarians of the 20th century have taught us to speak up and have lots of patience because truth is worth fighting for and injustice is worth standing up against.

Speaking the truth and asking for rights is not anti – national. If anything, in the long-term truth through mutual reapect for all builds the character of a nation as the last century has shown but requires patience. Change is not wrong, resistance to change is. Will an intersex, immigrant, IVF father be persecuted, threatened, intimidated, even if systemically for stating facts? Or will he be listened and the right answer is to have proper laws in best interest of IVF children? More importantly, without proper laws, is it creating an environment of more innocent victims including children where some people may do anything to have a child including secrecy, lies, cheating, fraud, breaking laws?

It is obvious the laws have not caught up with technology as per US DoS report. What about people who take advantage of these loopholes for personal benefit breaking the laws? It is clear that how US family courts treat a “parent-child” relationship in the context of IVF is very different than how US Immigration laws view the same relationship. What about people who take advantage of these loopholes and escape justice? More importantly, how do the lies and secrecy help the innocent IVF children? In 2009, David Goldman was united with his son after 5 years without raising any issues of the impact on a 9 year old removed from his biological grandparents, the primary care provider. Ann  Pettway was convicted after 23 years of raising a child like her own through fraud documents in US. In 2009, an innocent IVF child was taken away from his biological father and his primary care provider while his sister was abandoned in India. In a case of dolus eventualis and fait accompli, an intersex, immigrant, IVF father was traumatized beyond imagination and had to both save his child in India and give her rights. Since the entire situation is NEW, what are the rights of an  IVF child born during a divorce? It seems a child is a child but afraid so, an international IVF child born during a divorce has no rights and can simply be discarded with no consequences. Is this the America we want? Or do we respect all? If the US system has been manipulated, what will it do? How will it stop from creating more innocent victims and send a strong message? Laws/change will come, whether its 25, 9, or 27 years later, what we need now is no more innocent IVF child victims. Respect all, equality for everyone. When will the dream to have equal intersex and IVF rights become a reality? 

“Tear down these walls” – as US President Reagan said. When will the walls of secrecy and lies be broken and we can dream to live in a world where we can speak the truth freely without intimidation, persecution, threats?

The Americans I Know

Those who deny freedom to others deserve it not for themselves.” – US President Abraham Lincoln

Men – their rights and nothing more; Women – their rights and nothing less. Failure is impossible.” – Susan B. Anthony

Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much. All the world is full of suffering. It is also full of overcoming.” – Helen Keller

The only tired I was, was tired of giving in. You must never be fearful about what you are doing when it is right.” – Rosa Parks

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.” – Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

“We can’t help everyone, but everyone can help someone.” – US President Ronald Reagan
The Americans I Know care about human beings, human rights, child rights, truth, morals, principles, rule of law. However, this is NOT the America I 

Mia-Love-the-america-i-know-is-great-ivfknow through its laws.

Does an abandoned IVF child have a right to life?

The Americans I Know would willingly die for something they love like the thousands of soldiers who have died for their country they love. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know would stand up for what’s right, stand up for a principle even if it means going against the tide of the time and face stiff opposition. Like Abraham Lincoln or Susan Anthony or Rosa Parks or MLK, Jr. or Edie Windsor. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know believe in doing the “right thing” and not just paying lip service. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws..

The Americans I Know believe in liberty, justice and freedom for all including innocent IVF children. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know would cry and cringe and rally around a cry of innocent little children to be freed. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know would do anything to protect the rights of innocent voiceless children. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know would hate to create STATELESS children and place innocent children in legal limbo. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know would defend the rights of innocent children regardless of their birth type. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know would require a person be held accountable and responsible for abandoning an IVF pregnancy and look after the welfare of the abandoned IVF child. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know would require a person be held accountable and responsible for abandoning an IVF pregnancy and look after the welfare of the surrogate as per the terms. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know would treat all children equal – especially an IVF brother and sister born exactly the same way. However, this is NOT the America I know through its laws.

The Americans I Know are not proud of the “baby scoop era“.

The Americans I Know would not split up siblings.

The Americans I Know who may be gay or lesbian or intersex would respect the laws and wait for years if not decades until same-sex marriages became legal so they can get legally married and NOT break the law and “hush” up everything.

The Americans I Know who may be in a same-sex marriage would love to sponsor their spouse for immigration but would follow the laws and not break the laws.

The Americans I Know would be proud of showing compassion and love.

I Am ____

I am Scottsboro boysI am

I am Baby Scoop Era

I am IVF

I am immigrant

I am DSD family

I am LGBTI family

I am invisible

I am Rosa Parks

I am Susan B Anthony

I am Erin Brockovich

I am Edie Windsor

I am Tony Briffa

I am civil rights

I am reproductive rights

I am immigrant rights

I am family rights

I am IVF child

I am thankful for the compassionate donors and surrogates without whom could not have had lovely IVF children

I am caregiver

I am brother

I am sister

I am child

I am father

I am mother

I am primary care provider

I am infertile or dysfertile

I am human

I am no more lying

I am truth

This case is about all these people and only truth can get us a solution. Secrecy and lies punishes innocents and continued lies and secrecy to hid one lie further aggravates the situation failing to provide a solution. There are others who matter and who are human beings too. I am one of them to confront truth before its too late and not someone who is DSD, immigrant, infertile and enjoys an IVF child while claiming the child is natural born.

Relentless secrecy, lies, fraud, abuse, crimes, breaking the laws can help one achieve access to an immigrant, non-biological child but what is the greater good? Can it change facts?

This was not a crime of greed, this was not a crime of vengeance, but it was an act of selfishness, a crime of selfishness” – said Judge P. Kevin Castel of Federal District Court.

  1. While they can enjoy the IVF child, what does the IVF child want and need? If there is compassion for DSD, should there also be compassion for IVF child?
  2. While they can enjoy the IVF child, they still cannot change the fact that their actions are directly responsible for placing innocent IVF children in legal limbo and splitting the IVF siblings and two innocent childhoods have been robbed.
  3. While they can enjoy the IVF child, they still cannot change the fact that several DSD people cannot immigrate based on marriage because they dont have marriage rights and consequently no DSD family rights.
  4. While they can enjoy the IVF child, they still cannot change the fact that several infertile people cannot bring their non-biological IVF child to the US because of lack of immigration laws.
  5. While they can enjoy the IVF child, they still cannot change the fact that it is their lies and secrecy which has caused the innocent IVF children to be placed in legal limbo.
  6. While they can enjoy the IVF child, they still cannot change the fact that thousands of DSD people are born every year with the same natural condition and living without equal rights. Secrecy and lies will not help them achieve equal rights, truth, education, and awareness will.
  7. While they can enjoy the IVF child, they still cannot change the fact that the IVF child has a very loving parent, siblings, grandparents, and others who love him dearly but are denied his rights and their rights.
  8. While they can enjoy the IVF child, they still cannot change the fact about the compassion of egg donor and surrogate women and instead of celebrating their contribution, why lie to pass of the IVF child as a natural born child. Will the love for the child become any less by saying the truth? Why forbid others to say the truth?
  9. While they can enjoy the IVF child, they still cannot change the fact that there is a lack of laws for IVF children and families. The lack of laws is like placing a “staircase” in front of a wheelchair bound person. Would they have any experience about lack of “rights” as a DSD, immigrant, infertile person? And secrecy and lies is the right solution?
  10. While they can continue to lie, defame, violate human beings, they still cannot change the fact that this is about a DSD family, IVF parent, binational immigrant filled with noble intentions, love and compassion. Have they tried that lately –  Compassion and Truth? Despite the denial of DSD, infertility, we will always be canaries in the coal mine. Despite the secrecy and lies, we have been to DSD, IVF, Immigration and Beyond in 2000s.

This is about someone who is a relentless criminal and will abuse, violate, lie, fraud anyone including innocent children. Do the children have rights? Do other DSD people have rights? Do IVF parents have rights? Do caregiver have rights? Do immigrants have rights?

A Child’s Wish – Rosa Parks Again

Oprah to Lance Armstrong said : “Truth shall set you free”

Vedant was an innocent 2 year old. He wanted a sibling. Having been born into a dysfunctional intersex family

child wish rosa parks again

was not his fault. He is free to wish for whatever he wants, or is he?  When Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat, she did so because she was TIRED. She was NOT trying to start some revolution. An IVF father was simply TRYING to give his son his wish, a SIBLING. He was not looking to learn about the INEQUALITY in LAWS and INHERITING the INEQUALITY in LAWS for intersex families. Let us speak up to CHANGE the LAWS and not BREAK the LAWS. Here is a heartfelt experience of an IVF father to have an IVF child. Maulik was lucky to have been blessed with a lovely daughter, Medhavi, Vedant’s sibling, even after multiple failed IVF attempts and persistence.

IVF Child Abandonment

The innocent IVF sibling, now Medhavi, was six months term in a surrogate’s womb when a vicious and fraudulent divorce was filed without a SINGLE mention of the ongoing pregnancy. There was every INTENT to have the siblings grow up TOGETHER or why did the intersex person agree for the second surrogacy. Why the intersex person chose to WITHHOLD key information from the court only they can answer. Why the intersex person did not travel to India for the second child’s birth to satisfy US Immigration Law requirements so that the siblings can be together can only be answered by them. Why are the CHILDREN BEING PUNISHED BY BEING MADE TO GROW UP SEPARATELY? Was there proper due process under prevailing laws or has the legal system been manipulated for personal motive? It is IMPOSSIBLE for an intersex person to have custody of an international IVF child WITHOUT BREAKING the PREVAILING LAWS. Have any CRIMES been committed?

If female foeticide is a crime, female infanticide is a crime, abandoning and endangering the welfare of a child is a crime then why is abandoning and endangering the welfare of an IVF girl child NOT a crime? Lets make it a crime in the 21st century or we risk proliferation of baby making factories and gross violation of innocent children. Should we legalize human cloning for personal and selfish amusement? Has Vedant abandoned his sister? Then why is he being forced to do so in practice?

Journey of an IVF Father who is a LESSER parent

For 3 years, after several failed attempts, sleepless nights, anxiety, trauma, multiple trips by the father alone to the IVF clinic, a lovely sibling was conceived. Jai Sri Krishna! Hallelueah! Anyone who has dealt with IVF knows that there is MORE uncertainty than success. Vedant never had to experience any of this as he was too young to understand or comprehend. But it was his wish to have a sibling that transpired all this. Then why has he NOT met his sibling? What is the innocent children’s fault? Maybe if the father was a woman or maybe if the father was gay in 21st century or maybe if the father was an intersex spouse in the 22nd century, he would have “social acceptance” and implicitly his children. Isn’t it time to have LAWS to reflect the changing technology of the 21st century or BAN IVF for males who need BOTH an egg donor and a SURROGATE. If the infertility isn’t traumatic enough, the inequality in LAWS and the absolute DISDAIN for EQUAL IVF CHILD RIGHTS is MORE TRAUMATIC because that is INSULTING the basic right of your child. Just like forced adoptions in the 1960s and 1970s from single mothers was a failed approach and governments are apologizing today, separating siblings based on their biological parent’s GENDER is wrong in 2013. Give children their own INDIVIDUAL rights.

An IVF father is living in EXILE from the US because his innocent IVF daughter was not allowed to enter the US akin to several gay couples living in exile from the US because same-sex spouse cannot enter the US. Yeah, the IVF father could have chose to give up his second child, Vedant’s sibling, for adoption or maybe even have an abortion at the cost of the surrogate. But no, the innocent sibling lives, Vedant’s sibling lives, her name is Medhavi. Take a look at her now and you will know why it is vital to save her even if it meant giving up a career, a life of over 21 years in the US. Her one smile is worth a lot more than that. But an IVF father has to overcome the stereotype of the societal norms that because he is male, he is unemotional and unworthy to be an equal parent and therefore it is OK to punish his children. Bring it, ready to take on the biggest powers for sake of the innocent children. There have been several OBSTACLES in becoming an IVF father, one more for the sake of innocent children.

Social Acceptance

Maybe if the two siblings had been born to a woman, they would be together. Maybe if the IVF father had used the egg or womb of his wife to have a child, then both siblings would be together. And the LAWS support that. Was the IVF father and spouse caregiver of intersex WRONG to have a child in a dysfunctional intersex marriage? Then PUNISH the father for not reporting the fraud, abuse and crimes and for showing compassion to an intersex person. Why are the CHILDREN BEING PUNISHED BY BEING MADE TO GROW UP SEPARATELY?

Maybe if a gay man had duped a female friend into surrogacy, the two siblings would be together. But if a straight IVF father has two children through IVF, then they are separated even though an intersex person duped the father.

There are 8 different ways parenthood can be assigned when a child is born through IVF. There is ONLY ONE way parenthood can be assigned in a natural born child. Then WHY are we trying to fit a square peg in a round hole? Do the laws capture all 8 different scenarios?

2101 : An IVF Siblings Odyssey

In a future world, our requests for CHANGE will be met which are Unification of the siblings is inevitable, equal IVF child rights, equal intersex rights. Then why not save the innocent childhoods today? Even if Vedant grows up WITHOUT his sibling and loving biological family through FRAUD, other intersex people still cannot legally marry, other intersex people still cannot have children legally. By speaking up, we are asking for accelerated CHANGE for the greater good. We invite anyone and everyone who believe in EQUAL RIGHTS FOR ALL. Help us GRANT Vedant his wish to have a SIBLING.

A poem from a sister to her brother:

I have eyes but cannot see you,

I have ears but cannot hear your voice,

I have hands but cannot hug you,

I have lips but cannot kiss you,

I have my favorite pink birthday cake but cannot share it with you,

If we are special, I hope someone is thinking about US more than others.