Tag Archives: male

Respect – Living the Life as A Woman

I am a male. I am not transgender, I am not intersex/DSD, I am not a woman. But having experiences like family caregiving, infertility, primary care provider for children which are “traditionally” associated with women has provided me with a fresh perspective on what it may have been like to live as a woman and undergo abuse for centuries. The worst is that my gender is punishing my innocent children which has forced me to speak up. I have learnt a lot from Susan Anthony’s, Rosa Parks’s and other women in the world and also from likes of Scotsboro boys’. While there is no comparison to what women have gone through for centuries; the injustice, neglect, abuse is what is in common – which is why there is Respect for living as a woman. Sadly, it is a cycle of being used, abused and discarded by others that we find in common. When will we have laws to protect hate crimes against IVF children and families?

1) When I was abused, I stayed silent. The law enforcement tells me that I should have spoken up then and its too late to get justice now. Does that mean the abuse did not occur? When laws were broken forcefully, I stayed silent. The law enforcement tells me that I should have reported the crimes. Does that mean the crimes did not occur? Ironically, plight of some IVF children today is what was done to innocent intersex children which is lies, fraud and manipulation.

2) If there are rape trauma crises centers, if there are sexual abuse trauma crises centers, if there are child abuse trauma crises centers, where are the IVF trauma crises centers? Having crises centers for different issues implies two things – 1) There is acceptance of facts and the need to act to protect the innocent and 2) Qualified professionals trained to act in the best interest of the victim – medical, legal, financial, etc.

In the absence of IVF trauma centers, are we as a society not wanting to accept the facts and that IVF trauma does not exist and it is better to shove the truth under the carpet like the way our society dealt with concealment based approach in treating intersex people or taking away innocent children from their biological mothers during the government approved “baby scoop era”? In the absence of IVF trauma centers, are we as a society failing to provide qualified professionals to victims including innocent IVF children and until justice is received, does it mean the victimization and abuse continues which is blessed by the system due to its inaction and lack of laws?

3) If a woman is pregnant and her spouse abandons the child and the mother-to-be, it is a sinking feeling. Is it like getting kicked in the stomach as a pregnant woman? As a left-behind parent, one moves on for the sake of the child with no child support, loss of dignity and respect for innocent child, possible character humiliations, loss of job, career, separation from family and friends, etc. Same is true for a left-behind IVF parent of an abandoned IVF child, one finds the strength and courage to move on for the sake of the child despite being a male as the society and laws deem “fathers” are “second-class” parents.

If a woman who is abandoned while pregnant, what if the spouse runs away with the older child? This leaves the woman to deal with her pregnancy all alone, provide welfare of the child on her own AND the trauma of losing a child whom she loves. Worse, the older child will not be afforded the love of a sibling he wanted because the parent has split them. In all this, the mother raises the abandoned child through the trauma and hopes someday her children will be UNITED. Is an IVF father of two split siblings allowed to have the same feeling?

If an intended parent abandons an IVF pregnancy after giving consent, who pays the surrogate and what are her rights and whose responsibility it it to raise the IVF child? Is the surrogate also considered a woman whose rights have been violated if left abandoned with an IVF child?

4) For centuries women have been the “traditional family caregiver” and for most part they still are in a majority now. A family caregiver can be in multiple roles – as a parent, child, sibling, etc. However, insenuations have existed like “being a housewife is not a real job”, “stay at home mothers” do not contribute to society, etc. Yet as loving mothers or spouses or daughters or sisters as they are, they continue to spread their love (often in silence) regardless of what laws say or what society thinks while giving up their true potential, ambitions, careers. Same is true as a spouse caregiver of intersex/DSD who is forced into silence.

And when women started asking for their rights be it rape, disenfranchisement, abuse, violence, sexual harassment, etc. initially, it was written off as “being emotional”. That was last century and it may be true even today in several parts of the world. An immigrant, IVF father feels the same way and demand for rights is discarded as “being emotional” while failing to recognize that it is the innocent IVF children who are the ones being punished because of their parent’s gender. Just like Susan Anthony’s of the world, one must continue to fight for the truth regardless of how long it takes.

5) If a woman uses her egg and gets help from a sperm donor and surrogate, she can legally take the child anywhere while if a man uses his sperm and gets help from a egg donor and surrogate, the same is not true. Who is the real victim – the IVF father or the innocent IVF child? Like any parent – mother or father, gay or straight, black or white or Asian, child with Autism or a learning challenge, etc, etc – any parent will speak up when their child is abused, violated and worse used as a “tool”. Every human being has rights, including an innocent IVF child of an IVF father.

6) There is no “I” in infertility or IVF. Dealing with infertility first requires lot of patience and compassion from fellow human beings. “I” cannot do anything. The anxiety, the sleepless nights, the pain, the suffering, the trauma, the loss of child, the failed IVF cycles, the multiple trips to the IVF clinic filled with hope, the thumbing through online forums, the blessing of a IVF child, the joy and celebration of an IVF child, etc etc affects any person dealing with IVF and infertility – it is NOT a woman or man thing, it is a HUMAN thing. Having lived through these experiences which are traditionally associated with women dealing with fertility, it has given a unique perspective on even how innocent IVF children are victimized due to being born to a “man” VS. “woman”. Our society and laws have a long way to catch up.

7) It has taken centuries and lots of abuse, violation of rights, trauma for women to begin to get equal rights in the workplace. When will men get equal rights at home in the family especially in the best interest of innocent children?

8) To the naysayers, I ask a simple question, exactly what more do you want out of a spouse – male, female, straight, gay, lesbian, intersex, otherwise?

  • You have a traumatic condition, you deal with it together and become a spouse caregiver,
  • One spouse wants silence at the cost of abuse to the other spouse, you give silence,
  • One spouse wants to lie, fraud and break the laws, you give in to the threats and abuse in silence,
  • One spouse is infertile, you deal with it together using IVF,
  • One spouse is under medical treatment and trauma preventing to be a “primary care provider” for the child, you become a primary care provider for the IVF child in silence,
  • The IVF child both love wants a sibling, both give joint consent to have a second IVF child, one spouse decides to abandon the child while the other is left to pick up the pieces including giving up his son whom he loves AND his son having to give up his primary care provider and a sister he wanted.

Perhaps the spouse is looking for slaves including innocent children with no human rights in 2014? 

Don’t give me love, don’t give me compassion, just give me respect and truth.

If being in a intersex/DSD marriage which the laws do not recognize, if becoming a spouse caregiver of DSD/intersex for a surgery which UN considers torture, if dealing with infertility with respect for the infertile spouse, if raising IVF children due to ongoing medical treatment of the spouse, if dealing with multiple lack of laws for issues like intersex, IVF, immigration in 2014 is too new is RESPECT, then all I ask is to give RESPECT to my innocent children if not me and UNITE them.

Had equal rights for intersex, equal rights for IVF children and families existed, would innocent IVF siblings have been SPLIT? Economic deprivation and loss of financial resources directly threatens the right to get justice in 2014 because no counsel works for free.

The Father’s Day I Was Forced to Miss

Every IVF journey is unique in its own way. Regardless of the fertility issues, the wanting to have a child is common to being a human not whether youfathers-day-ivf are fertile or infertile or married or unmarried or male or female. That’s why our society allows heterosexuals, singles, married, gays, lesbians and whatever other segmentation to be loving parents. Good parenting is based on being a good human being and not your gender or your sexual orientation or you immigration status. For any IVF parent – whether they are successful or not with an IVF child, wanting to have a child is innate and tugs at every emotion that a human is known to have. Then why can’t an IVF father celebrate Father’s Day on becoming a happy father? The Father’s Day I NEVER had.

It was ten years ago, my first child was born through IVF, a lovely son. He was born a few days ahead of Father’s day that year BUT I could not celebrate and jump with joy for my child because the SECRET might be out that my spouse is infertile. I was forced to miss my First Father’s Day. Today, the lies have caught up because my innocent IVF children are paying the price for it and it is time to speak up for their sake. Due to my spouse’s infertility and respecting that, I am the biological father and with help of compassionate egg donor and surrogate, we were blessed with a lovely IVF son. But the IVF was a secret and we could not tell anyone because the infertile spouse did not want to reveal to anyone about the infertility. To the select few, we could talk about surrogacy but under NO circumstances we could reveal that there was NO BIOLOGICAL LINK between the infertile spouse and the IVF child because god forbid, what if people find out the truth? Of course, due to the LIES, not only the innocent child got placed in LEGAL LIMBO but ended up disrespecting the compassion of the egg donor and surrogate for not giving them due credit. As the saying goes, when you live with a criminal who breaks laws, you pick up bad habits. Having a child through IVF is not a bad habit, LYING and continuing to LIE is the bad habit. Infertility is NOT bad, it is natural. How one deals with infertility is what is bad like secrecy and lies for personal advantage.

  • Can an IVF father be allowed to celebrate his child’s birth?
  • Can an IVF father be allowed to share his emotions from a traumatic IVF journey?
  • Can an IVF father be allowed to enjoy the company of all his IVF children as he wanted?
  • Should the innocent children of an IVF father be discriminated because of the gender of their father?
  • Is infertility so traumatic that the ONLY way to solve it is by SPLITTING innocent IVF siblings?
  • Is infertility so traumatic that the ONLY way to solve it is by alienating an IVF father from his lovely son and vice versa?
  • As a fertile IVF father, I have STARED infertility in its face. I know infertility. I have tried to defeat infertility. I know the trauma. I know the emotions. I know the lack of laws. I know that it is the LOVE and CHARACTER of a parent that counts and NOT the gender or genetic link of a parent with a child like the laws demand.
  • IVF is meant to help with infertility. Regardless of the trauma of infertility, what is happening to innocent IVF children who are siblings is far MORE traumatic. I am their IVF father and I intend to protect my IVF children and get them their rights. This fight is NO different than slavery, women suffrage, Brown Vs. Board of education, civil rights, gay rights, transgender rights, and now IVF rights. Personally I believe that over the history, every social struggle has needed a catalyst like Rosa Parks. Who is the Rosa Parks for IVF? Who is the Harvey Milk for IVF? Who is the Laverne Cox for IVF?

A shout out to all fathers – IVF, white, black, brown, blue, maroon, single, married, divorced, straight, gay, intersex, otherwise – Have a Happy Father’s Day and may you NEVER be forced to MISS a father’s day.

As another year goes by and with tears in my eyes as I get cake and card for my alienated son on father’s day and his birthday (they happen to be very close, if you recall), I wonder why should a brother be SPLIT from his sister, why should a son be separated from his IVF parent and what did all the lies achieve? Divorces are not new, they happen. But should the “best interest of the child” be maintained in any divorce? Should innocent IVF children be placed in legal limbo due to divorce? Should innocent IVF siblings be SPLIT? Should innocent IVF children be abandoned with no recourse for justice? If you consent to IVF, you are responsible for welfare of the IVF child – simple. Not the donor, not the surrogate, not the IVF clinic, not the orphanage where the innocent IVF child may end up, but the consenting IVF parent has to be held accountable and responsible. Its a new century and the crimes are new, have the laws caught up yet for IVF children and families?

 

Lessons Learnt from Lack of Laws for Intersex, IVF, Immigration, Invisibility

Before anyone is a male or female, they are first a human being. Before anyone is a human being, if they have children, they are a parent. The point is abe-kind-to-unkind parent is willing to take abuse if it protects their child meaning giving up their own human rights. Too often issues are divided based on male Vs. female, right Vs. wrong, or based on race, or religion or sexual orientation, or rich Vs. poor or whatever is the new divisive flavor of the day. Individuals who are human beings live personal lives. Human beings live their lives as per emotions, however, lives are lived as per laws regardless of how archaic the laws may be. Sometime in the 21st century, there will be equal rights for intersex, immigrants, infertile, IVF. Till then what is it like to live in the 21st century with 20th century laws? Here are top lessons learnt from lack of laws for intersex, IVF, Immigration and Invisibility.

  1. Be kind to unkind people, they need it the most. Do not lie to your spouse especially if it places another human being at risk and victimizes them due to lack of laws. That is unkind. Being intersex, infertile, immigrant or invisible are separate issues. Fundamentally, any loving relationship – marriage or otherwise cannot be built on the foundation of lies – it affects the individual and everyone else around them.
  2. Be ruthlessly selfish – You will get what you want. As a law-abiding person, be very selfish meaning use the laws to your advantage but don’t be ruthless like splitting innocent siblings or abandoning one sibling to have another or alienating a child from his family. You may be able to look yourself in the mirror, you may be able to hoodwink the authorities and break laws relentlessly, but can you look into the innocent eyes of the victimized children?
  3. Male Chauvinistic Pig – Until the laws are changed, in some cases, it may be better to be a male chauvinistic pig in the best interest of your children. Anti-male laws may have good reasoning but when anti-male laws are used against innocent children because their only legal parent is a “male”, maybe it is better to be a male chauvinistic pig instead of showing compassion so at least the innocent children are saved.
  4. Fraud – While laws may not recognize intersex marriages, in time the laws will change to allow intersex marriages. However, fraud will still remain fraud. It is not that intersex marriage is wrong but fraud is wrong. The lack of laws in recognizing an intersex marriage affects and victimizes both spouses equally.
  5. Secrecy and Lies – One can lie and fraud to break the laws but how does it help others and the greater good?
  6. Do the Next – Dealing with infertility and intersex is a double whammy and very traumatic. Add the layer of immigration and invisibility only makes it more complicated and  traumatic. Whose human rights do you uphold? Person who lies and breaks the laws in secrecy OR person who wants to be free from the social and legal discrimination using truth? After living through intersex, IVF, immigration, it is the innocent child who wins – hands down and not a liar who breaks laws and places innocent children at risk and in legal limbo. Can you do the “next” and start living in the 21st century?
  7. Caregiving – Becoming a family caregiver is both a privilege and a balancing act. Doing it in secrecy is foolish. When anyone becomes a family caregiver, it shows they deeply love and care for a fellow human being. It comes with its own stress, issues, and balancing acts. When you are forced to do this in silence and secrecy, is it abuse? The abuse is the “secrecy and silence” part. Every human has the right to express freely including a caregiver.
  8. IVFHood – Its a minority neighborhood. Its a secretive neighborhood. There is lot of support available in 2014 than in 2003. If you gave up your life trying to have a child with someone who the laws do not support like an intersex, infertile, immigrant in the US, then NO ONE CARES if you did. Its a lonely neighborhood. Worse, your IVF children will be punished for being born in an intersex, immigrant family in 2000s as if its their crime. Your fertility used as a currency in the war on fertility against you and your innocent children.
  9. Legal System – It is non-existant when it comes to intersex, immigrant, IVF family in 2000s. Legally, we do not exist. If you confess to the truth, then the legal system has to deal based on prevailing laws and legally an intersex, immigrant, IVF family does not exist. So it is best to make them invisible, pretend they do not exist, suppress facts and split innocent IVF siblings – we are sure it is the BEST solution – more lies!
  10. Workarounds – People who are either naive or stupid offer options like asking the IVF father to adopt his own biological IVF child to “workaround” the limitations in current IVF laws. They fail to recognize how offensive this is. Its kinda like asking a man of color in 1800 that if they don’t like being a slave, why don’t they just change the color of their skin? Slavery was legal in 1800 but the discriminatory laws did not stand the test of time. It would be better for the person of color to fight on the right side of history and NOT change the color of their skin just to “workaround” the prevailing laws. Or maybe telling a woman of the suffrage woman of the early 1900s to just become a man to get equal rights. Similarly for an IVF father in 2014, it is better to stay on the right side of history and get the facts out and ask for their rights and their innocent IVF children’s rights rather than submit to the persecution and threats of a failed judicial system. It will definitely stand the test of time and more importantly, the biggest jury for an abused IVF father are his innocent IVF children – what do they think?

One Thing I Cannot give my IVF children

Legally, I cannot give a sister to my son and a big brother to my daughter because I am an IVF parent and an IVF family must be punished and discriminated. Innocent, voiceless children must be ivf-child-2014-equal-rights-lawspunished because for crimes they did not commit and for being born through IVF. January 12 is World Daughter Day and today let us celebrate all daughters – future sisters, wives, mothers, aunts and maybe someday there will be IVF children day when world is more accommodating. In 2014, having children through compassion from anonymous egg donor and surrogate is such a terrible crime that the innocent IVF brother and sister must be punished for crimes they did not commit. I kept my IVF son’s dream to have a sibling. A father’s dream should become his innocent children’s nightmare because he dared to be compassionate and wanted to have children. I have a dream…that someday siblings will be able to grow up together happily despite their primary care provider being a father. I have a dream…that the love and character of a parent counts more than gender of a parent.

I gave a piece of myself, I gave multiple sleepless nights, I fought with infertility in a marriage, I gave multiple international lonely trips to have a child through IVF, I sought help and compassion of other women including egg donors and surrogates, I stayed persistent and kept trying despite multiple failed IVF attempts, I am responsible for my children, I physically had two IVF children but one thing I cannot give my IVF children is a physical hug, kiss, embrace, love, companionship of a brother and sister. One thing I cannot give my IVF children is a valid legal identity. One thing I cannot give my IVF children is freedom because I am an IVF parent. I miss him on missing out because of my gender.

I have hit the pavement, endeared abuses in your name, endeared abuses in my name because I dared to have children through IVF, I have seen doors slammed in my face because I ask for your IVF child rights, I have seen offensive and abusive legal language in prevailing laws against IVF children and families, I have felt that doing IVF is a crime, I have felt that having IVF children is a crime, I have felt that my IVF children should be punished like criminals. No one’s innocent children are criminals just based on their birth type – it is discrimination. Just like discrimination that occurred during slavery, women suffrage, civil rights, colonialism, apartheid, gay rights and so on. If the laws have not caught up with technology, it is a legislative issue, that does not mean innocent IVF children are criminals. NO “parent” including a traditional parent or a statesperson of a country or an entrepreneur or a politician for the lack of laws likes to hear their “baby” called ugly. Why is it OK to treat an IVF child without basic human dignity or respect?

While most US family courts are based on love and character of a parent, the US Immigration laws are based on biology and gender of a parent – a stark contradiction. While most US family courts consider the woman who gave birth to the child as the mother, the US immigration laws require a genetic link which means a surrogate in an IVF child is immaterial as per US laws – a stark contradiction. While most US family courts consider a child born during a marriage as a “child of the marriage”, the US immigration laws consider an IVF child as “child born out of wedlock” – a stark contradiction. While US family courts would see that a person is a caring primary care provider for his child regardless of the parent’s gender being male, the US immigration law requires an immigrant father to have a “US mother” to bring an IVF child to the US – a stark contradiction.

Since US Immigration laws require a “genetic link” between a US parent and child born outside the US, here are some thoughts.

1) Should infertile parents take their 9-month term pregnant surrogate to the nearest US consulate or Embassy to give birth to their US citizen child to bypass the immigration laws?

2) Should infertile parents be treated like military families who give birth to their child born outside the US but due to circumstances are deployed outside of the US?

3) Should innocent children of Americans who dare to innovate and think outside the box be punished because of their parents actions?

4) Do infertile middle-class Americans who are infertile deserve to be childless as per laws requiring a “genetic link”?

Reproduction is a human right and regardless of laws, people are going to continue and try to procreate with the tools available. How do we protect the innocent children? Do fruits of fertility treatments like IVF children deserve equal respect and protection under the laws? Is it time for laws to catch up with technology?

While every child is special, an IVF child is coming together of more than just two parents. It embodies the best of humanity. Dehumanizing and disrespecting an IVF child is also disrespecting the best of humanity starting with the innocent IVF child.

Need To Separate Fact from Fiction, Need to Separate Wishful Thinking from Facts

  • A 1 year, 364 days old infant does not need a ticket on the plane but a 2 year old does. It’s the law.
  • truth-shakeThe minimum age is 7 days old for any infant to travel on a plane, an important criterion for an IVF child born to international parents wanting to go back home. Emotions don’t count but laws do.
  • Any infant under 6 months travelling on a plane needs 1 adult with them – particularly important if twins are born to a parent who is travelling alone. More relevant for an international IVF parent who is trying to go home with IVF twins or triplets – higher frequency than natural births. Emotions don’t count, it’s the law.
  • Immigration law requires a biological link between parent and child – emotions don’t count, it’s the law.
  • Immigrant fathers cannot bring their IVF child to US-  emotions don’t count, it’s the law.
  • Alienated parents love their child equally, more importantly, the child loves the parent equally but the best interest of the child does not count.
  • Baby scoop era was detrimental and served no real purpose, existence of single mothers and truth and reconciliation commissions have proved it.
  • The plight of Scottsboro boys is wrong, their pardons prove it. The case spawned new laws for due process and inclusion of African Americans on jury prove their innocence. When will due process and immigrant, IVF jury be allowed for immigrant IVF parents?
  • When I see an abandoned IVF daughter, I see the criminal who did this.
  • When I see an abandoned IVF daughter in legal limbo, I see the criminal who did this.
  • When I see an IVF daughter try to move forward in life but has no legal identity, I see the criminal who did this.
  • When I see an IVF child in legal limbo, I see the criminal who abused before.
  • When I see an IVF infant being starved for food, I see the criminal lying and abusing the child.
  • If breastfeeding by males is so common, why don’t mothers ask the fathers of their newborns to breastfeed?
  • Regardless whether it’s a male or female trying to breastfeed an infant, when there is no milk, is it abuse if you make the infant cry endlessly out of hunger? What else is food for an infant other than milk?
  • Having been diagnosed with interex/DSD condition is very traumatic, being forced to live a life of secrecy and lies, breaking laws, why repeat that on innocent IVF children who are no less dealt with their own secrecy, stigma, lies, breaking laws to deal with?
  • While every human deserves a child, while every parent wishes to breastfeed their child, we still have to deal with science.

There is truth in acceptance and abuse in lies on oneself and others whom you claim to love the most.

Miss You on Missing Out

The reason an IVF brother cannot see his IVF sister or his biological family is because he is born through IVF to an immigrant, IVF father in 2000s – tooIVF-children-alienation early for our times. If he is happy growing up away from his biological family without his knowledge, could he have been HAPPIER growing up freely with his siblings, family, truth, having a valid legal identity? When love is enveloped with secrecy, lies, fraud, abuse, breaking laws, criminal acts, is it love? It is not ONLY about the infertile and affluent adult but also about donors, surrogates and IVF children. Pass laws and not separate children from biological family like the baby scoop era. We miss our child on missing out :

0) Our son cannot fulfill his dream of having a sibling – journey that took 3 years, several failed IVF attempts, and 4 more unjust years and counting…

1) Our son cannot kiss or hug his sister and a sister cannot kiss or hug her brother. It is about the love.

2) Our son cannot marvel first hand at how infants are so small and how they grow up. It is about the love.

3) Our son cannot play house, or kitchen, or bath time with his sister and enjoy the awesome play juice and play snacks she makes. Siblings will fight with each other but when a third person enters, they become a team of one – typical siblings – our son misses out. It is about the love.

4) Our son cannot celebrate in sibling events like Rakhi, Bhai Duj, Siblings Day and so on. It is about the love.

5) Our son is being brainwashed and alienated from his biological family. It is about the love.

6) Our son cannot read books, ride the bike, fly kites, and so on with his siblings. It is about the love.

It is one thing to have anti-gay laws, anti-IVF laws, anti-intersex laws, anti-immigrant laws, but to use them in order to SPLIT innocent IVF siblings takes it to whole another level – certainly not the best interest of the child. And if a person did not care about the human rights of an intersex, immigrant, infertile person, would they have international IVF children as an immigrant and spouse caregiver of intersex? It is time to move on and start thinking about the future generations of IVF children and families…An IVF parent is very resilient, persistent and determined – its in their IVF DNA.

7) Our son does not have a valid legal identity to travel and so much education, exposure to his growth and development is stunted. Is it love?

8) Our son has to be lied to about his birth and the fact it is through IVF which dishonors the very basic fundamentals of humanity and compassion of people like the donor and the surrogate. Will he learn to be compassionate? Will he learn to speak the truth? Is it love?

9) When equal rights do not exist, one should not break the laws but respect the laws and demand for a change in laws. By forcing secrecy, lies, abuse, defamation, breaking the laws and forcing anyone to speak the truth to bring change is no way to teach an innocent child. Is it love?

10)  Every human being deserves a child but it needs to be done ethically, morally, and legally because no matter how good a parent you are now, one has to face their IVF child eventually with facts and love. There is no love in secrecy, lies, and breaking the laws – it is criminal. There is no love in abandoning an IVF child during pregnancy, it is criminal. There is no love in continuing to place innocent IVF children in legal limbo for personal benefit and call it love – its selfishness which is a crime as per Judge Castel.

Should Genetic Males Be Allowed to Breastfeed?

Should there be laws and regulations to protect the best interest of the infant?

Should genetic males be allowed Male Breastfeedingto breastfeed? Even if that is allowed and in fact if there is milk, thats good for the child. What if there is no milk? Since breastfeeding most commonly occurs in private, should the child be protected from the parent who may be starving an infant in the zeal to breastfeed with no milk? Should there be any legal oversight in the best interest of the innocent, voiceless infant?

No one is against breastfeeding. The question is should an infant be allowed to be fed when there is MILK? The question is NOT whether a mother, father, gay parent, lesbian parent, intersex parent, adoptive parent, etc. should be allowed to feed, the question is should an infant be starved when there is NO MILK from the breasts?

Do mothers who just gave birth to a child ask their husband or father of the child to breastfeed?

Do gay parents try to breastfeed their child or give the child formula milk?

Should single male parents be allowed to breastfeed?

Should IVF children who may be born without a physical mother being around after birth be allowed to be breastfed by genetic males?

As the recent medical report on Adam Lanza, the teenage shooter in the Sandy Hooks Elementary school shooting, shows, a policy of “appeasement” is not helping and worse has disastrous consequences on innocent victims. Have we taken any cross-functional learning lessons?