Tag Archives: gandhi

Whose stateless child survivor would you rather be – ISIS or international IVF/Surrogacy? Or neither?

Many people, especially ignorant people want to punish you for speaking the truth, for being correct, for being you. Never apolgize for being correct or for being years ahead of your time. If you’re right and you know it, speak your mind. Speak you rmind even if you are a minority of one.  The truth is still the truth. ” – Mahatma Gandhi

On Gandhi Jayanti day, will anyone come to the rescue of stateless children and move forward with the truth?

For most people, it would be insane to compare ISIS Stateless Child and international IVF/Surrogacy Stateless Child but that’s because they have not been viewed from the perspective of a stateless child.STATELESS No loving parent will take the dehumanization of their innocent child lying down – whether done by a stranger OR a relative because it hurts innocent children. In a civilized world, we do NOT make children stateless deliberately and if they become stateless inadvertenty as in the case of IVF/Surrogacy, we resolve it fastest like Australia did in the case of baby Gammy. As a normal human being, we all have sympathy and compassion whenever we hear of an innocent child dying while trying to escape torture, but what does it mean to be stateless? As an educated, white collar professional, what does it mean to raise a stateless child? DEHUMANIZATION of the innocent child – that’s what statelessness is regardless how one got there – physical warfare or lies that break the laws. Who answers the questions of a stateless child?

When a child is stateless, well, they are stateless regardless of how they got there….war, refugee, slavery, international IVF/Surrogacy. As a loving parent, one has to move forward and deal with the practical implications OR abandon the innocent child and run away – sadly no one will care because they are stateless meaning NO RIGHTS. A stateless child means loss of freedom, no identity, loss of basic human dignity and respect, no chance of approaching a court for justice against the perpetrator. For example, a fleeing stateless child can make an arduous trip to Europe or America in trying to escape the persecution and if they die due to the hardships, they have no rights against the person who created this situation.

The Hole Pope said, “I Am Convinced That We Can Make A Difference“. Be it the Catholic church taking decades to recognize the sexual abuse against innocent children while protecting adults OR philanthropists like Rajat Gupta and Bernie Madoff frauding people, OR corporations like Volkswagen falsifying documents and tests, in the end truth prevails no matter how long it takes. We have no doubt the truth will prevail in this case also but will the innocent children be spared and be united and allowed to grow up together in truth and freedom?

Prime Minister Modi of India at his UN speech in 2015 PM Modi of India at UN 2015, “We must reform the United Nations including its Security Council so that it carries greater credibility and legitimacy”. The future is about truth and transparency like books about IVF/Surrogacy for children to help understand the facts and NOT about lies which hurts children and breaks laws like making children “STATELESS”.

And let’s hope the powers to be can address the needs of an abandoned IVF/Surrogacy child by an American who has been DENIED “truth”, “liberty”, and “justice”.  And how does this help a child? Even if inadvertently, are we dehumanizing the child? We just want the cruelty to stop against innocent IVF/Surrogacy children and families.

I don’t have a child who is blind, deaf, without a limb or leg, with Down’s syndrome, with Cystic Fibrosis, or any other commercial condition, I have a child who was used as a tool for blackmail and denied rights as a human being and is stateless. I have children who count and are stateless, is that enough to be treated as an equal?

 

Made Stateless by ISIS, Saddam, GaddafiMade Stateless by IVF/Surrogacy - baby GammyMade Stateless by IVF/Surrogacy - baby Modi
Loss of Freedom (Prison)YesYesYes
Loss of Fundamental RightsYesYesYes
Respect as a ChildNoYesNo
Dignity as a Human BeingNoYesNo
Refugee StatusYesYesNo
Justice and relief from perpetratorNoYesNo

Be The Change You Wish To See In This World

Let us celebrate Mahatma and his teachings on this Gandhi Jayanti day. Like another great leader and a follower of Gandhiji, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. said, we have a dream that one day there will be equal rights for IVF children and families.gandhi-king-respect

IVF siblings are in legal limbo because we lied about intersex, IVF, and immigration. IVF siblings are in legal limbo because we tried to give rights to intersex and related issues in secrecy where government itself falls short. Intersex have been dealt with secrecy and lies in a failed approach and now repeat a similar strategy of secrecy and lies on IVF children and families and expect different results? How will it help the greater good?

When life gives you lemons, you can make lemonade. When life throws a curve ball, you can hit it out of the park or go out trying hard.  When someone makes you break laws, you can speak up for a better future especially for innocent children. Dealing with secrecy and lies helps no one. Education and awareness and empowering people with truth is far better. Dealing with issues like intersex, infertility (IVF), immigration in 2000s is a challenge for anyone let alone dealing with any one of these issues individually – to deal with all of them together and remaining invisible is creating innocent, unsuspecting victims. These are not separate issues, because in an intersex marriage, they also have to deal with infertility, and because they went for affordable IVF outside the US unlike mega-rich folks in the US, they also have to deal with immigration. The starting point is secrecy and lies with intersex and certainly the end will NOT be continued lies and breaking laws. Its a new dawn and we want equal rights for IVF children and families and intersex families. So, lets march ahead! Will you join us?

In 2013, the UN Special Rapporteur on Torture called for a STOP to unnecessary intersex surgeries. Yet we were made to go through it in 2002 during a marriage with no proper protocol, is it torture? What if we had been allowed to be open about it like a breast or testicular cancer, could we have got better help? Could the education and awareness have helped a greater good sooner?

The claim is that there is a risk of testicular cancer in intersex patients if they do not remove the testes. What is the risk profile? In IVF children due to the fertility treatments, hormones, the induced egg harvesting, the frozen samples, a study claims IVF children are a third more likely to have cancer, they are at 65% risk of having leukemia. If an IVF child needs a bone marrow to live and is forcibly separated from his biological family using fraud documents, who will save his life? What is in the best interest of the IVF child?

In 2013, a first of its kind legal case was filed in the US for unnecessary intersex surgery. The current protocol of misinformation, secrecy, lies, fraud medical records in dealing with intersex surgery during marriage in 2002 is a disservice to both and should be stopped immediately in its current form.

In 2013, people are still struggling to have insurance companies pay for these unnecessary intersex surgeries because they are being honest about it. What if they instead lie and lie on medical records and fraud the insurance company into paying for the surgery? How has lying helped the greater good?

In 2013, Germany will become the first country in the “western nations” to legally recognize intersex as the “third gender”. Earlier in 2011, Australia and New Zealand also allowed a legal recognition of “third gender” while several Asian countries have legally recognized the “third gender” for some time now. By having “legal recognition”, one can get legal rights and more importantly have issues addressed like intersex rights, infertility rights and immigration rights.

In 2013, US started allowing “same-sex” couples to legally sponsor their partner’s immigration and thus not breaking families or forcing them to live in exile or secrecy. What if someone lied and got their US Immigration before 2013 by hiding their “same-sex” condition – they got a personal benefit but how did it help others like them? Empower with truth like Edie Windsor or lie for individual benefit?

In 2013, US Citizens and residents still cannot bring an IVF child born outside the US with “no biological link”. Some people may have lied, created fraud records and got an IVF child illegally into the US by breaking the laws, they got an individual benefit, how did it help other infertile people or other immigrants or other intersex people? How did it help the IVF child by being in legal limbo? What does the UN Special Rapporteur on Human Rights and/or Child Rights have to say on this?

In 2013, surrogate and intended mothers are fighting to get rights for maternity leave when the IVF child is born. What if someone lied and frauded the FMLA system in 2004 for an IVF child but did not disclose it? By lying, they got an individual benefit but how did it help the greater good and other intended and surrogate mothers? Does this mean that gay fathers or single fathers or fathers who are primary care providers for IVF children do not deserve leave when child is born? Or are we just ignoring them and pretend they do not exist?

There are people who are looking for insurance coverage today to help with their infertility which requires saying the truth. Since we lied about IVF and infertility, we could not avail of this and more importantly we could not join the voice of others asking for fertility rights. Ironically, it is the lack of fertility rights which is the cause for splitting the IVF siblings.  By staying silent we cannot help a greater good and it is important to speak up for oneself and others.

In 2013, what happens to IVF children who are born either due to an accident in the IVF clinic or a commissioning parent abandoned the IVF pregnancy and placing them in legal limbo and causing them to be stateless. What are the rights of such IVF children? Maybe we are asking too many questions too soon and should wait a few more years until we get a critical mass of “stateless IVF children” and left-behind parents. Punishing innocent, voiceless children that we “create” is not why we brought them into this world, right?

We are sympathetic to an intersex, infertile, immigrant – let our actions speak louder than words who were sent as canaries in the coal mine. But we also have issues due to lack of laws around intersex, infertility, and immigration and have a right to be heard – especially for innocent, voiceless IVF children. Our IVF children are SPLIT due to lack of laws, we cannot continue to bear and endure the torture and trauma in silence. We cannot see other IVF children, other infertile people, other immigrants just continue to be victimized and suffer just for speaking the truth. What we need is a legal framework and allow us to live in harmony with equal rights. Keep marching ahead.

In this generation, people who thought and looked ahead are punished and worse innocent IVF children are punished including abuse, silence, defamation, breaking the laws at any cost to steal a child away from his loving, caring biological family and the primary care provider. Let us hope in the future that people who look and think ahead if not rewarded are at least not punished and at the very least, their children are not punished for crimes they did not commit.

Social Justice

Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.“. – Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.Proactive

“You must be the change you want to see in the world.”Mahatma Gandhi

If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide.” – Mahatma Gandhi

Join the union, girls, and together say Equal Pay for Equal Work.”  – Susan B. Anthony

For our journey is not complete until our wives, our mothers and daughters can earn a living equal to their efforts.” – US President Obama in 2013 at the inaugural address :

Seems like NOT much has CHANGED.

The list can go on as we as a humanity have a deep and long history. Lot of us humans have lived great lives and often pondered about the grave injustices of our times. After all, we are all mortals and cannot live forever. It seems throughout human history, there has always been some kind of social injustice. Whether its slavery or colonialism or casteism or racism or apartheid or women suffrage or civil rights or forced adoption of biological children from their “single mothers” or interracial marriages or gay rights or intersex rights or IVF (in vitro fertilization) rights and so on.

There are some VERY STRONG links between these.

1) They are widely accepted as social injustices. At one point in time, it was perfectly “legal” to practice these acts while once the struggle for social justice as had, laws were passed, the SAME ACTS became ILLEGAL.

2) After years or decades of struggle, at some point in time, the world does wake up, pass the EQUAL laws despite the STRONGEST of objections.

3) Typically, the group that is affected the most by each of these acts is a MINORITY.

4) In a democracy, the minority cannot get EQUAL rights without help and support from the MAJORITY even though these issues DO NOT affect the majority.

5) The people who may NOT be affected by these issues still need to be educated and made aware of the issues of each of these acts and the unequality it creates. This can ONLY be done through discussion, dialogue and sharing of truth and facts.

6) The MINORITIES continue to be victimized for which there is NO relief until the EQUAL laws come.

If history is a window into the future, more social injustices will be unearthed in the future, more struggles will be had, after education and spreading awareness, EQUAL laws will come. This is the cycle that humanity has created. Not perfect, but it is our utopia. We simply cannot satisfy ALL. Does that mean the voices who ask to be heard for their justice are WRONG? and should be SILENCED? Disagreeing with someone is NOT a CRIME, however using threats and oppression and manipulating LAWS is to SILENCE someone asking for justice is a CRIME.

Years ago a breast cancer patient lived in secrecy and stigma. There were less “survivors”. Today with awareness, education, truth, not only we have MORE SURVIVORS but also because of awareness there is better support both emotionally AND in research and development for better medical treatment including early diagnosis. Events like the recent publicity around Angelina Jolie only makes it more mainstream. If a spouse caregiver of breast cancer has the right to share facts and truth, does a spouse caregiver of intersex have same and EQUAL rights? More importantly, how is the secrecy helping anyone?

Is it wrong to ask for EQUAL rights for IVF children and families? Is it wrong to ask for EQUAL rights for intersex people and families? Unless we understand the LEGAL issues and the inequality that the IVF and intersex families are facing in 2013, how can the majority understand the issues they are facing? Without the majority understanding the issues, how can there be help and support in a democracy for the minority? Thats the system that us humans have set up. Vote banking. Not perfect but it is something and we have to work in those confines. May take years, decades or even expired lifetimes BUT that does not mean SILENCING the voices asking for justice and equality. Or does it?