Tag Archives: denial of rights

The risk of not acting is greater than the risk of acting

The risk of not acting is greater than the risk of acting” – said US Secretary of State John Kerry.Syria-chemical-weapons-victims

Is the same true about the situation of IVF children and families? Especially cases that involve international IVF and the entire IVF ecosystem – donors, surrogates, parents and most importantly, the IVF children. Infertility is traumatic but should a solution come at the price of crimes, lies and denial of rights of other human beings?

When innocent, voiceless children are being hurt, being abused, maybe someone cares enough to take action and do something about it than just paying lip service. The current climate of lack of laws for international IVF/Surrogacy children is dire. There are international laws for child abduction and child adoption but how come there are no international laws for IVF/surrogate children?

In Syria over a period of two years since 2011, more than a 100,000 innocent civilians including children were killed. However, when about 1500 innocent civilians including children were killed in a chemical weapons attack, it calls out to our conscience in a different way, why? What is so heinous about a chemical weapons attack that killed about 1500 people somehow MORE important than the previous 100,000 innocent lives lost? Or is it a culmination of the last two years and the gruesome way in which the last innocent 1500 humans were killed that calls out to our morality and legality? Is it the final straw that broke the camel’s back?

A decade of secrecy and lies can also have a similar effect. When you lie about an intersex surgery and the effects it causes including abuse, when you hurry to have a child not knowing the effects of an intersex surgery, when you lie about the IVF child as being a natural born child, when you break the laws incessantly, when you get abused in silence, it is not the aggregate of all these events but the heinous way in which the innocent, voiceless IVF siblings were SPLIT – does it call out to your morality and legality to take actionIs it the final straw that broke the camel’s back?

If the people responsible for this heinous chemical attack are not held accountable, is the risk they will REPEAT this action or is it a GREATER RISK that someone ELSE will repeat these actions and have no consequences and denial of rights to innocent victims including children? Someone has to speak up and take action even if they are alone. What’s right is right and what’s wrong is wrong. It calls out to our basic human dignity and respect.

If an IVF child is abandoned causing DENIAL of rights and a state of LEGAL LIMBO, should the perpetrators be held accountable for this heinous act against the innocent, voiceless IVF child? Is the risk they will REPEAT this action or is it a GREATER RISK that someone ELSE will repeat these actions and have no consequences and denial of rights to innocent victims including children? Someone has to speak up and take action even if they are alone. What’s right is right and what’s wrong is wrong. It calls out to our basic human dignity and respect. Why does an IVF child need to be treated like “property” and go unchecked?

While the innocent civilians including children died an unnecessary and a cruel death – the ultimate crime…the innocent IVF children left in LEGAL LIMBO are living an unnecessary and cruel death – what is worse? Because when someone legal status is in limbo, they have no legal rights and hence no justice and no relief as a victim but instead are forced to LIVE in silence and become invisible. Their basic human dignity and respect as a human being is denied or deleted. Why?

Is the risk of not acting greater than the risk of acting for the sake of IVF children and families?

What is Worse – DENIAL of rights or VIOLATION of rights?

Rights are always an evolving subject and sadly have to be demanded. Rights of one person maybe oppressive for others. And as time progresses,Human Rights we move forward and have social justice for people. It is difficult to talk about EQUAL rights. Because what may be unequal TODAY, may become equal TOMORROW. So EQUAL RIGHTS are a transient subject. Whether it is women suffrage, civil rights, gay rights or what have you. Now we are at brink of IVF rights. First, does infertility ONLY affect women? Does infertility affect women MORE? IVF is a journey and not just a point in time. IVF affects the parents deeply regardless of the gender – male, female or third gender if you live in progressive countries where third gender is legally recognized. It is safe to assume anyone whose rights have been violated, they want justice, again regardless of gender. What about people whose rights are DENIED?

A person whose rights are violated MEANS they have some rights. Now they can approach a justice system, present the FACTS, and have rights to a DUE PROCESS. Regardless of the result, at least RIGHTS exist for a human being which have been violated and they can seek justice. What happens when your rights are DENIED? What happens when your LEGAL STATUS is in LEGAL LIMBO? What are the rights of the person? Who do they go to for DUE PROCESS? Where do they present the FACTS? Regardless of the outcome, we need to have RIGHTS for every human being.

As a proud IVF parent of two lovely IVF children – a son and a daughter – on two separate CONTINENTS who are in LEGAL LIMBO, who do we turn to for justice? Who do we turn to for relief as victims? It is very easy for the so-called “experts” to make a cursory remark to say, “One has to move on”. EXACTLY. One needs a LEGAL IDENTITY to move on. Getting out of being STATELESS and having a LEGAL IDENTITY is moving on. Having the freedom not to be land-locked is MOVING ON. These are existential issues of an IVF family who are immigrants and are forced into silence and made INVISIBLE. How do we move on?

If a woman is raped, decades ago and sadly still occurs, the victim is forced into silence under threats. It takes great courage to stand up for yourself and DEMAND rights and justice and to show other rape victims and survivors that one must MOVE ON. Rape is RAPE – heinous and criminal – both for the ones who report it and the ones who suffer in silence. But there is a law for rape, there is a place for justice. The wheels of justice may find the accused guilty or innocent but there is some avenue to seek justice.

If a girl IVF child is abandoned and placed in a LEGAL LIMBO and thus denying their basic human dignity and respect, where and who we go to for RELIEF as VICTIMS? We are not even asking for justice, we are only asking for an opportunity to a LEGAL IDENTITY so we can MOVE ON. What do you answer to a young child who wonders why they cannot get a passport to travel? Why should their education, exposure, freedom be curtailed for actions or inactions of other criminals? Should we stay silent and NOT report the CRIME? Should we suffer in SILENCE? TRUTH, education, awareness are far greater tools. Infertility is traumatic, an IVF child is a technological answer to infertility BUT to have no respect and dignity for a HUMAN LIFE – an innocent, voiceless IVF child is heinous and criminal. If female foeticide is a crime, if female infanticide is a crime, if abandoning a natural birth child is a crime, why is abandoning an IVF girl child NOT a crime? Is the VALUE of an IVF girl child LESS than a natural born child? We have heard statements like, “IVF is not natural and thats what you get for trying IVF”…really? Take a look at our innocent IVF daughter and then have the GUTS to say that. She is a FULL BLOODED HUMAN BEING and as a parent we will defend her rights and DEMAND for her RIGHTS if they DO NOT EXIST. She and other IVF children like her deserve basic human dignity and respect. We CANNOT punish innocent, voiceless children for criminal intent of adults. Why are IVFphiles walking around freely while the victims are being punished in silence without any justice?