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To Intersex, IVF and Beyond

Buzz Lightyear came a few years before my first IVF child was born in 2004. Infinity and Beyond is something I buzz_lightyear_infinity_and_beyondalways imagined sharing with him. When Toy Story 3 was announced, I looked forward to seeing it with him in theaters in 2010 but we NEVER got to experience that together due to an unprecedented and vicious divorce and parental alienation. The heart is still in the same place, except the theme has changed – to intersex, IVF, immigration and Beyond. Just like sometimes a hunter becomes the hunted, sometimes a fertile person becomes infertile due to the trauma and experiences of IVF even though biologically they may be fertile.

The Beyond

As Buzz lightyear would say to INFINITY and beyond, we are to intersex, IVF, immigration and BEYOND. Someday, we will be blessed to see Toy Story series together with all the children as a family. I miss my son and love him deeply. I miss my son missing his siblings. The second IVF child was his dream to have a sibling. For those who think the IVF child is happy, how do you know he cannot be HAPPIER with his siblings and family? Has he been allowed an OPPORTUNITY to experience that? The ones who are trying to SILENCE the TRUTH are EQUALLY culpable in the CRIMES committed. Silence will NOT get new laws and equality; TRUTH will. Silence will NOT get relief for victims and justice;TRUTH will. By requesting SILENCE, are you implicitly implying NO JUSTICE or RELIEF for victims – the innocent, voiceless children – brother and sister? Infertility is very traumatic, lack of laws to assist infertile families is MORE traumatic. For the record, we did try SILENCE for a decade; the result is in front of you…still want to IMPOSE SILENCE?

While others are talking about EQUAL rights for intersex, the spouse stayed married in an intersex marriage despite the fraud. While others are talking about EQUAL rights for non-biological parents, the biological parent SHARED his child with a non-biological parent. While others are talking about EQUAL immigration rights for LGBTI, the intersex spouse immigrated based on an intersex marriage long before it became a law. The result of incessant lying, breaking the laws is PUNISHMENT for innocent, IVF children. What would be the point of staying silent? If saying the TRUTH is a crime, we are guilty. What is lying, creating and using the fraud documents, breaking the laws; are those crimes? While others are still fighting for equal marriage rights and equal immigration rights, and next will come equal “fertility or dysfertility” rights (impact of legal gay marriages), we have gone BEYOND it and are living it.

Slaves to Secrecy and Lying – Break Free with Education and Awareness

Had we relied on TRUTH, none of this would have happened. Had the two IVF siblings been UNITED, none of this TRUTH would come out. Given the legal complications of the case and FACTUALLY not in favor of immigrants, intersex, non-biological IVF parent, does that JUSTIFY abandoning an IVF child, AND DENYING an IVF child their legal rights AND making them STATELESS AND placing them in LEGAL LIMBO? The intersex person who filed for divorce in US did NOT mention the ongoing IVF pregnancy in India they agreed to. The intersex person NEVER came to India to take the IVF child to the US to “fool” the US Immigration laws. What if the intersex person came to India, take custody of second IVF child and return to the US and then filed for divorce, would the PREVAILING LAWS have been in their favor? Would the IVF father have mounted a LEGIT defense and got DUE PROCESS to ensure his IVF children STAY UNITED? If laws have been broken, have CRIMES been committed? Has DUE PROCESS been given to innocent, voiceless IVF children and family?

Whether the IVF siblings are united or not, the FACTS will NOT change. The lesson learnt is innocent children get punished for crimes they did not commit. No more LYING. As an IVF parent, thats the worst thing is to have the lies, fraud, abuse REPEATED on your children.  Is an IVF child a “property” to be treated as “leverage” to hide facts and break laws OR does the IVF child have RIGHTS? Does the US condone behavior to place “orders” for IVF babies by their residents and then have NO legal responsibility or accountability? As a fellow US Citizen, thats NOT the country I know. We stand up for what’s right and we give a voice to the voiceless.

Intersex people deserve equal rights and there is a legitimate way to do it (ask Edie Windsor) for benefit of all. Hurting innocent, voiceless children CAN NEVER be the answer on the path to EQUAL intersex rights. Ironically, intersex children also have been victims of secrecy and lies and now so are IVF children. And how will secrecy and lies help this time? If intersex are a minority, what is a spouse caregiver of intersex AND an immigrant IVF father – a minority within a minority?

LOVE – Spouse and Child

The intersex spouse underwent an unprecedented medical treatment for intersex during marriage. There are intersex people who undergo the same treatment either in childhood or puberty or outside of marriage as an adult. It is a controversial treatment which the UN Special Rapporteur on Torture has called for a STOP in 2013. What are the effects when an intersex person undergoes the same controversial torturous surgery during marraige? Are the medical professionals equipped to DEAL with the issues when performing this surgery during a marriage or are they CLUELESS? Are their CLUELESS treatments HURTING innocent, unsuspecting intersex couples and families and their children yet to be born even if inadvertent? Doctors should NEVER LIE which involves breaking laws, period! What is so complicated to understand? Were we used like canary in the coal mine?

Due to the ongoing medical treatment of intersex under secrecy, lies and fraud, the TRUTH was NEVER revealed. FACTS were ignored. ABUSE went unreported. The father became the primary care provider for his IVF son developing a deep bond and love between PRIMARY CARE PROVIDER and CHILD. Socially its recognized as a “father-son” relationship which has multitude of issues including alienation of a child from a father is legalized.

The million dollar question is NOT status quo or strategy of it is better to ask for forgiveness than permission. The million dollar question is the best interest of the IVF child. Can someone show us the LAWS where an intersex person can legally marry in 1999 in India (in 2013 its still illegal), immigrate to the US based on the marriage (same-sex immigration was legalized in 2013 in the US), have an IVF child born in India immigrate to the US legally (suppression of facts, lies, fraud), have a same-sex divorce legalized in Texas in 2010 (same-sex marriage still illegal in Texas), ….the list goes ON. By ignoring these FACTS and maintaining status quo, how will we get EQUAL rights for intersex, how will we get EQUAL rights for IVF children and families, how will we get EQUAL rights for caregivers?

IVFphile – A New Criminal

With changing times, there are changing circumstances. As parents, we have new challenges and new megan law - pedophile - IVFphileareas to protect our kids from. When one sees an innocent, voiceless IVF daughter due to NO FAULT of her own in a LEGAL LIMBO, what do you tell her? In a world where rights of adult are MORE POWERFUL than child’s rights or human rights, how does an innocent, voiceless child ask for her rights? As an IVF parent, the question is how do we move forward NOW? What is the path for relief for victims? There are 7 billion people in this world. Sadly, some are pedophiles who prey on innocent, voiceless children. We have laws to protect the innocent children AND provide a path for relief as victims because of a few bad apples. The pedophiles maybe parents themselves but still commit such atrocious crimes against innocent children. As an IVF parent left with an abandoned IVF child in LEGAL LIMBO, where is the relief for victim? How does one move forward with an improper LEGAL STATUS? Do people in LEGAL LIMBO have rights? We need ANSWERS to our IVF daughter’s questions.

If we can have laws against pedophiles, why can’t we have laws against IVFphiles to protect IVF children? Who is an IVFphile?

IVFphile is a person who commissioned a pregnancy through IVF where they may or may not have a biological link with the child and then abandons the IVF pregnancy midway with no responsibility or accountability for the IVF child and/or the surrogate. The term “biological link” is subjective and is a separate discussion including immigration laws. Suffice it to say, it has double standards as per convenience sake of the adult and NOT the child. Are we as a society saying that as long as you are affluent, one can place “orders” for IVF baby and later when they change their minds and not want the IVF child; the IVF child has NO rights or there is NO accountability or responsibility towards the IVF child or the surrogate or the left-behind family? It spells HORROR life. And that’s what IVFphiles do. When an IVFphile abandons a IVF child domestically, at least the left-behind family have options. When an IVFphile abandons a IVF child internationally, due to immigration laws (or rather lack thereof), the left-behind family may be SPLIT. The IVF child may be STATELESS and in LEGAL LIMBO due to NO FAULT of theirs. Most IVF pregnancies do NOT end this way and IVF parents including non-biological parents go through great sacrifices to ensure the best interest of the IVF child, IVFphiles don’t.

In 2005, a Canadian couple had opted for IVF in India but due to an accident at the IVF clinic in India, the sample got swapped and thus there was a DNA mismatch. As per prevailing immigration laws, the IVF child could NOT immigrate to Canada without a “biological link”. The non-biological IVF parents gave up everything in Canada and moved to India for 6 years and fought for 6 years to have the IVF child legally taken to Canada. It is NOT about the biology, it is about LOVE and TRUTH and while they had 6 horrific years they never planned or imagined, their prayers were answered because they spoke the TRUTH. In the end, what’s right is right and what’s wrong is wrong.

The case for laws for IVFphiles 

1) Any technology can be misused and we MUST have laws to protect and safeguard the innocent and voiceless. In its current infancy of IVF laws, we need to RAISE the bar and get EQUAL laws for IVF children and families. Welcome to the 21st century!

2) In a natural born pregnancy, if a woman is pregnant, she cannot just decide to “abandon” the pregnancy mid-way, the child is physically inside her womb and there are laws that GOVERN abortion. Then why can an IVF parent give up a child with no responsibility or accountability? What about the risk to the surrogate?

3) If a woman is pregnant beyond the second trimester, most countries regulate abortions if the woman no longer wants the child either due to medical complications or otherwise. Should IVF pregnancies also be REGULATED if an IVF parent abandons an IVF pregnancy midway in the second trimester or later? Is the IVF child SAME or EQUAL as a natural born child?

4) If a man abandons a natural born pregnancy, he can still be held accountable and responsible for the child. If a man OR woman who use a surrogate to have an IVF child and then decide to abandon the IVF pregnancy mid-way, should there be ANY legal implications? What about the welfare of the child? What about the welfare of the surrogate? Who will raise the child? Did the IVF child agree to be born? What’s next, human cloning for personal amusement?

5) If a man abandons a pregnant woman mid-way through the pregnancy, the left-behind woman and the child get support and are protected under laws. If a man or woman abandons an IVF pregnancy, what are the laws to protect the welfare of the left-behind parent and IVF child?

6) If a DONOR who signed forms indicating no relationship OR responsibility for an IVF child can be held accountable for child support, why cannot an abandoning commissioning parent for IVF child ALSO be held equally accountable?

The abandoning of an IVF pregnancy is one thing. But the effects of it are where we need LAWS and REGULATIONS in the best interest of the IVF children and families, donors, and surrogates. We have to begin with proper LEGAL STATUS for the IVF child so that they can DEMAND their legal rights. Can we prevent more IVFphiles? Are we protected from IVFphiles even if its just a few bad apples?

Just like pedophiles, IVFphiles may also be parents living amongst us but we may never know the true nature until it is revealed. A parent of a child who has been victimized by a pedophile first protects the child and tries to console them depending on their age if they understand what exactly happened. But certain scars NEVER go away and one can only understand as that victimized child and the parents. A left-behind IVF parent of an IVF child who has been victimized by an IVFphile ALSO first protects the child and tries to console them based on their understanding. But certain scars NEVER go away because every IVF birth is a journey deep with an emotional and financial roller coaster ride and possibly multiple failed attempts.

The difference is victims of pedophiles have a legal recourse with relief for victims, where are the laws to protect innocent, voiceless children and victims from IVFphiles? One can never escape justice especially of the crime against humanity kind. Nazi war criminals were brought to justice decades after the crimes because their crimes were horrific. Is deliberately making an innocent IVF child in a state of legal limbo (and thus denying them basic human rights and legal rights) a crime against humanity from the child’s perspective?

An IVF son cannot see his father because…

The FATHER, the primary care provider, and SON must be punished for DARING to attempt to give HUMAN truthRIGHTS to someone in SILENCE within the four walls of the house. What a terrible CRIME that is committed that the father and his IVF children MUST be PUNISHED and SEPARATED. Should we REPEAT baby scoop era on “socially unacceptable” norms which governments apologized for later? A father and son who LOVE each other deeply and miss each other terribly but MUST be SEPARATED because…infertility is a BIG CURSE? Are only INFERTILE people allowed to LOVE children? And the LOVE of the BIOLOGICAL PARENTS is NONSENSE? Infertility is natural – not a human’s fault but LYING, CRIMES to separate a father and son, a brother and sister, a child and his biological family is done by HUMANS – What is worse – the curse of nature or the curse of humans?

This was not a crime of greed, this was not a crime of vengeance, but it was an act of selfishness, a crime of selfishness” – said Judge P. Kevin Castel of Federal District Court.

An alienating parent STATING that the other parent CANNOT raise his child till the child is eighteen years of age is ABUSE. It may not seem that way now but just like the GAY rights movement, in a decade after the alienated parents’ movement, it will be CALLED ABUSE which is a crime. If a parent takes a son, a young male AWAY from his father until he is 18, it is ABUSE. If a non-biological, infertile parent takes a child away from the biological family till the child is 18 with heinous suppression of facts and breaking the laws, it is ABUSE. Could they have done this if LAWS were respected and DUE PROCESS was allowed and WITHOUT abandoning a second IVF sibling as a major decoy? Gay marriage was ILLEGAL in 2003 but is LEGAL in 2013. Parental Alienation is LEGAL in 2013, what will it be in 2023? You have to start thinking from the CHILD’s perspective?

If you can find something that you’re really passionate about, whether you’re a man or a woman comes a lot less into play. Passion is a gender-neutralizing force.” – said Ms. Marissa Mayer. As an IVF father, I am completely passionate about IVF, however, my gender of MALE was used against me and my IVF children to SPLIT them. We are still waiting for a gender-neutralizing force in parenting rights at home.

There are certain conventional wisdoms and then there are unconventional wisdoms. Living with a combination of intersex, infertility (IVF), immigration and invisibility (lack of laws) in 2000s is unconventional by any odds. In fact, the odds are 1 in a billion! So does that mean it’s OK to separate an IVF son from his father with LIES? Would an IVF mother be separated from her IVF child? Given the rarity of the case, we do not expect most people to understand the issues at FIRST GLANCE. A deeper understanding of the FACTS is required which calls for a small investment of your time. Certainly, the father cares and the IVF children care, because its their lives. For others, it may be just a statistic – 1 in a billion! Not to mention the laws that have been violated and the crimes committed to achieve the separation. If laws were followed, could the IVF family have been separated? Only a CRIMINAL is afraid of the TRUTH and attempts to muzzle the TRUTH. Will the LOVE for the innocent child be any LESS if TRUTH is known? For those of us who lie for others and its NOT natural, doesn’t it get tiring? Does an IVF parent have any right to see their IVF children together as they desired or should their GENDER be used against the innocent, voiceless children/siblings?

1) What a terrible crime the father has committed – he and his IVF children must be punished by separating them. Claiming to LOVE a child while separating him from his sibling, loving father, refusing FACTS and TRUTH (has legal implications), IT IS NOT LOVE for the innocent, voiceless CHILD. Placing the CHILDREN in LEGAL LIMBO is not LOVE for the CHILDREN, is it CRIMINAL? The male spouse (because of his gender) may NOT have human rights but does his IVF children have human rights? If one has committed NO CRIMES, then why do they need to FORCE SILENCE? Is that a continuation of ABUSE?

2) We are sympathetic to the intersex cause and not just in words but by actions. We have experienced the discrimination against the intersex family first-hand starting with the secrecy and lies. But does that mean our IVF son has to GIVE UP his biological family, his siblings, his father? Does that mean our IVF son has to give up his primary care provider? Is it a CRIME to be married to an intersex person and one must be PUNISHED by separating the children after LIVING through the secrecy, lies, fraud, abuse, violence, silence?

No one knows the future but what will remain constant is the TRUTH. Whether the US recognizes intersex as women or as third gender, no one knows. There are people calling for legal recognition of third gender in the US and other countries have legally recognized the third gender, no one knows where US laws will go. What we do know is that there has to be compliance with current laws and lying on legal documents and presenting them as “valid” documents in court is a crime. Regardless of which direction US laws go for intersex families, TRUTH will remain constant. A spouse caregiver of intersex, an immigrant IVF father of two lovely children appealing to UNITE them is the TRUTH even though it is construed as LIES for personal benefit. Ridiculous claims are made where person is NOT intersex or the torturous intersex surgery NEVER happened or the child is NOT IVF. Each has a legal implication. The right answer is change the laws, not to break the laws and harm and abuse innocent, unsuspecting victims. 

3) It is a FACT that the father was the PRIMARY CARE PROVIDER for the IVF infant because the intersex person was pre-disposed with their ongoing secretive medical treatment. Being intersex and being a genetic male has nothing to do with it, it is simply the ongoing medical treatment made the intersex person unavailable. And genetic males can be primary care providers of children like in a gay relationship or single fathers or a young, male, spouse caregiver of intersex AND IVF father. Secrecy and lies are NOT the answer. Empowerment with the TRUTH is the way forward.

4) If an intersex person wants to claim to be SAME as a woman, do it so legally and truthfully, not behind closed doors while breaking the laws. It has unintended consequences on innocent victims including children.

5) If a medical professional wants to claim an intersex person is SAME as a woman, do it so legally and truthfully, not behind closed doors while creating false medical records and breaking the laws. It has unintended consequences on innocent victims including children. Was the intent of the medical professional for the intersex person to use this fraud medical record in court of law as TRUTH? Will they support this fraud record? And if the medical community thinks its the right thing to do, then why have they STOPPED from creating such FRAUD medical records? What are the consequences – intended or inadvertent of FALSE medical records? What about the ABUSE on spouse and the innocent infant? When health professionals make false medical claims, it has reverberating effects on innocents including not getting justice they deserve.

6) If an intersex family wants to claim their child SAME as a woman, do it so truthfully and legally, not by DUPING and FRAUDING an unsuspecting victim into a marriage while breaking the laws. It has unintended consequences on innocent victims including children.

7) If parents of an intersex child wants to claim their child SAME as a woman, do it with pride and love, show up to help and support a spouse caregiver as their intersex child is working through the effects of an intersex surgery during a marriage. Unless you witness it, how do you know what its like? Continuing to lie for your child and teaching your child to lie has unintended consequences on innocent victims including children.

8) If an intersex family wants to claim their child SAME as a woman, do it with dignity, civility, and humility. A spouse of intersex has to deal with infertility, the parents DO NOT. How can they know the effects of infertility in a marriage? A spouse also has to deal with being the primary care provider for the IVF child due to the ongoing secret medical treatment of the intersex spouse. Lying has consequences on innocent victims including children and ironically, its the IVF children who are born due to the infertility.

9) By continuing to LIE and living in DENIAL is NOT helping anyone. Truth is the only way forward because separating SIBLINGS is heinous. Placing an “order” for an IVF child and later abandoning the IVF child with NO responsibility and accountability and placing the innocent IVF child in LEGAL LIMBO is heinous and a crime against her basic human rights. What’s next, HUMAN CLONING for personal amusement because some affluent person needs a kidney or a liver or a heart?

10) Disallowing the IVF son the TRUTH is perpetuating the same LIES that were taught to an intersex child. How did that turn out?

11) Disallowing the IVF son the TRUTH and NOT allowing him to meet his sibling or his father and the family is PERSONAL interest and NOT his best interest.

US is based on rule of laws and is a compassionate country. Do they condone this behavior? Will they take the time to invest in this case to understand the facts and see that the strategy of secrecy and lies used to “solve” social issues like “intersex” is being repeated for other social issues like “infertility – IVF”. Is that a good strategy? The consequences of lying, breaking the laws, secrecy eventually bears out. In the context of social issues, by helping ONE person through lying, secrecy, and breaking the laws, how does it help the other intersex children and other IVF children and families? The right answer is change the LAWS with our changing realities.

Do NOT PUNISH innocent children for crimes they did not commit.

What is Worse – DENIAL of rights or VIOLATION of rights?

Rights are always an evolving subject and sadly have to be demanded. Rights of one person maybe oppressive for others. And as time progresses,Human Rights we move forward and have social justice for people. It is difficult to talk about EQUAL rights. Because what may be unequal TODAY, may become equal TOMORROW. So EQUAL RIGHTS are a transient subject. Whether it is women suffrage, civil rights, gay rights or what have you. Now we are at brink of IVF rights. First, does infertility ONLY affect women? Does infertility affect women MORE? IVF is a journey and not just a point in time. IVF affects the parents deeply regardless of the gender – male, female or third gender if you live in progressive countries where third gender is legally recognized. It is safe to assume anyone whose rights have been violated, they want justice, again regardless of gender. What about people whose rights are DENIED?

A person whose rights are violated MEANS they have some rights. Now they can approach a justice system, present the FACTS, and have rights to a DUE PROCESS. Regardless of the result, at least RIGHTS exist for a human being which have been violated and they can seek justice. What happens when your rights are DENIED? What happens when your LEGAL STATUS is in LEGAL LIMBO? What are the rights of the person? Who do they go to for DUE PROCESS? Where do they present the FACTS? Regardless of the outcome, we need to have RIGHTS for every human being.

As a proud IVF parent of two lovely IVF children – a son and a daughter – on two separate CONTINENTS who are in LEGAL LIMBO, who do we turn to for justice? Who do we turn to for relief as victims? It is very easy for the so-called “experts” to make a cursory remark to say, “One has to move on”. EXACTLY. One needs a LEGAL IDENTITY to move on. Getting out of being STATELESS and having a LEGAL IDENTITY is moving on. Having the freedom not to be land-locked is MOVING ON. These are existential issues of an IVF family who are immigrants and are forced into silence and made INVISIBLE. How do we move on?

If a woman is raped, decades ago and sadly still occurs, the victim is forced into silence under threats. It takes great courage to stand up for yourself and DEMAND rights and justice and to show other rape victims and survivors that one must MOVE ON. Rape is RAPE – heinous and criminal – both for the ones who report it and the ones who suffer in silence. But there is a law for rape, there is a place for justice. The wheels of justice may find the accused guilty or innocent but there is some avenue to seek justice.

If a girl IVF child is abandoned and placed in a LEGAL LIMBO and thus denying their basic human dignity and respect, where and who we go to for RELIEF as VICTIMS? We are not even asking for justice, we are only asking for an opportunity to a LEGAL IDENTITY so we can MOVE ON. What do you answer to a young child who wonders why they cannot get a passport to travel? Why should their education, exposure, freedom be curtailed for actions or inactions of other criminals? Should we stay silent and NOT report the CRIME? Should we suffer in SILENCE? TRUTH, education, awareness are far greater tools. Infertility is traumatic, an IVF child is a technological answer to infertility BUT to have no respect and dignity for a HUMAN LIFE – an innocent, voiceless IVF child is heinous and criminal. If female foeticide is a crime, if female infanticide is a crime, if abandoning a natural birth child is a crime, why is abandoning an IVF girl child NOT a crime? Is the VALUE of an IVF girl child LESS than a natural born child? We have heard statements like, “IVF is not natural and thats what you get for trying IVF”…really? Take a look at our innocent IVF daughter and then have the GUTS to say that. She is a FULL BLOODED HUMAN BEING and as a parent we will defend her rights and DEMAND for her RIGHTS if they DO NOT EXIST. She and other IVF children like her deserve basic human dignity and respect. We CANNOT punish innocent, voiceless children for criminal intent of adults. Why are IVFphiles walking around freely while the victims are being punished in silence without any justice?

Natural or Human-Made Trauma?

There are varying degrees of trauma that people face day-in and day-out. The same event also affects each traumaperson differently. What is more traumatic? When trauma occurs for things outside your control or when trauma occurs due to someone else?

For example, being born intersex is not in a person’s control but is lying about it in their control? And what happens when you lie? Lets say you get into an illegal marriage by lying to an unsuspecting, innocent person and then you lie to the government to get immigration as a spouse, then you lie to have a biological child even though medically you are infertile, then you lie and separate the child from his biological family, then you lie and abandon an innocent child, a sister of the child you claim to love so much, then you lie, lie, lie. Do you ever stop and think as to how many other people are HURTING from the lies? how many LAWS have been broken? Are these crimes? And the LIES are great because not only you DUPED an innocent, unsuspecting spouse and got a chance to enslave them but you also FOOLED and BROKE LAWS of TWO GOVERNMENTS with NO RESPECT for RULE of LAW. Does that mean other intersex people can legally marry, does that mean other intersex people can immigrate legally through their spouse, does that mean other intersex people can have a child? What have the LIES and BREAKING the LAWS got you?

There are two types of trauma – natural and human-made. Which is worse? The trauma from natural causes is not a crime but causing human-made trauma to others including breaking laws, violating rights of others including innocent, voiceless children is multiple counts of crimes or is it?

Being Born Eunuch or Hijra or IntersexYesNo
Infertility Due to being born Eunuch or Hijra or IntersexYesNo
Family CaregiverNoYes
Saying a Thousand Lies to Hide One LieNoYes
Intersex Surgery and Ensuing Treatment and TraumaNoYes
Laws for Immigration of Eunuch or Hijra or Intersex spouseNoYes
Lies Causing to Break Laws and Abuse of ChildrenNoYes
Lies Causing STATELESS IVF ChildrenNoYes

March Ahead

We hope to teach our children to say the truth and when something is unfair, demand to change the laws, NOTMarch Forward BREAK the laws at the cost of ruining others’ lives. Do CRIMES pay?

Dealing with TWO MINORITIES – IVF and intersex is a question of survival and lack of support and awareness. Demanding EQUAL rights is a few decades away and probably past our lifetimes. Change begins with education and spreading awareness.

We cannot wait to see EQUAL RIGHTS for IVF CHILDREN because then their EXISTENCE will be recognized along with LEGAL RIGHTS.

We cannot wait to see LAWS based on LOVE of a parent rather than BIOLOGICAL LINK and GENDER.

We cannot wait to see the day when there are equal intersex rights. Will it come at the cost of SPLITTING innocent IVF siblings?

We cannot wait to see the day when same-sex marriages are legal. Will it be based on lying, cheating and fraud OR two men or women happily and honestly in love with each other?

With a pragmatic approach, sadly with marriages there are divorces. Will “same-sex” divorce hold the BEST INTEREST of the CHILDREN?

We cannot wait to see two males raising their lovely children because then fathers will get social acceptance as as the primary care provider and NOT used as a weapon against them.

We cannot wait to see a STOP to “normalization surgery” in intersex as demanded by us and as a Special Rapporteur on Torture at UN also stated so unequivocally. The difference is we demanded it based on first-hand experience while the UN did it based on academic expertise and so their voice is MORE POWERFUL and is heard. 

We cannot wait to see global reconciliation of “third gender” legal rights for binational third genders. While countries allow LEGAL recognition of third gender, other countries only recognize a binary gender. When a “third gender” person from such a country immigrates to a “binary gender” country, how will it be reconciled legally? And what about the basic human rights of the “third gender” person wanting to be recognized as “third gender”? Will they have to “give up” their legal recognition in order to immigrate to a “binary gender” country?

We JUMPED through SEVERAL HOOPS and answered the gut-wrenching questions in our own way, be human. Sadly, the approach of secrecy and lies is being used as a WEAPON against our innocent children. No parent would remain silent. Punish the criminals, punish the one who failed to report the crimes, but why punish the innocent children? Bestowing HUMAN RIGHTS as an individual where the LAWS fall short is WRONG because it PUNISHES innocent CHILDREN. Demand for change in LAWS, we look forward to the healthy discussion with TRUTH and FACTS.

Oppression, persecution, suppression of facts, and so on historically have been used when dealing with rights of minorities and social issues. Over time, all the tactics fail and LAWS are passed to give equality and sometimes even recognizing the people who fought for it, albeit posthumously. Is that hypocrisy? Avoiding the inevitable and punishing the innocent is a failed approach, let us try something different. TRUTH maybe? Let us see what the future brings. We are hopeful its a ray of sunshine glistening with TRUTH and EQUALITY.